Evermore
by mistressgenamalfoy
Summary: One year had passed since I heard from my best friend Violet. One year until I moved into the murder house and learned the truth. Saving souls is easier said than done. So is killing the Devil himself. Welcome home. Something about it is beautiful. T/OC
1. Chapter 1

_Don't listen when I scream _

_Bury your thoughts and fall asleep_

_Find out...I was just a bad dream_

_-Apparat, Goodbye_

* * *

><p><em>It was 1 year since I had heard from my best friend Violet. One year until I learned the truth. One year until we moved into the Murder House. The devil is beautiful. I can set them free. My name is Azura Talon, and I'm not afraid to die.<em>

*YES I AM ACTUALLY WRITING AN AHS FANFICTION. I CANT NOT DO IT. AND THIS WILL BE SICK!*


	2. Welcome Home

_"The end is inevitable"_

* * *

><p>Tick tock<p>

Tick tock

I look up at the clock, the seconds turning into unnerving minutes. What was taking so long? And although I should have known by now that having a medium for a mother usually took time, I still became impatient, especially with the current situation.

Tick tock.

I avert my eyes to my cell phone. Re-reading the text message I had gotten last week, almost thinking it was a dream. But it wasn't. It clearly had come from Violet. After she moved away, it was as if she had disappeared from the earth, leaving me with fond memories. It wasn't as if my mother didn't warn her father about the course he was taking, but then again Ben Harmon was never to keen about my mother's profession, and still he knew that me and Violet were inseparable. I had begged her to stay, because I had seen it too. Her fate. Irreversible and unavoidable. I knew then when I had no word from her that she had died in that place, the place they called the Murder House. I had warned her, but then again, she always thought I was silly. But, look at you now I had thought a few days later after receiving her request for help, you remain trapped forever, in a never-ending eternity. So naturally I did what any best friend would do. I told my mother and we bought the house. Simple, yet shocking to an outsider perhaps, but no, not to me. It was just me and mom. Poor daddy who left us (after calling my mother the devil I might add), would miss out on all the fun. I am not afraid. I have seen the darkness. I guess that's why me and Violet loved each other so much.

Tick tock.

* * *

><p>"We're here," I hear my mother say and my eyes immediately spring open, viewing life in front of me. My mom is already out of the car while I'm unbuckling my seatbelt. I step out of the car slowly, taking in the some-what Victorian-like structure ahead of me. God I could feel the energy baking off of it.<p>

"You feel that?" I questioned my mom.

Her eyes don't leave the house as she nods,"History wasn't kidding. This place is a pool of despair."

I join her by her side,"Piece of cake."

She finally turns to me and smiles,"Well, shall we?"

I nod and follow her up onto the porch as she opens the door and we enter. God, how I could feel it, and it wasn't inviting. But as soon as I looked around at the building that enclosed me, I fell in love. How sick. Perhaps it was because our furniture was already there and it just enhanced my feelings.

"Such pain," my mother mumbles as she traces her fingers on the walls. I watch her as she closes her eyes and opens them again,"Azura, this place isn't safe. You must be careful. You must avoid the darkness at all costs."

I roll my eyes,"Don't worry mom, I think I can handle it. I'm going to make sure they didn't mess up my room."

I dart up the stairs, my feet somehow knowing where to take me, until I finally found what was suppose to be my sanctuary. Upon entering however, I felt as if the room wasn't mine at all. Maybe it was because I sensed death in here, longing. Relieved that my bed was in the right spot, I jumped onto it, allowing my head to hit the pillow.

_I saw a boy_

_Guns_

_Blood_

I sat up quickly and immediately removed myself from the bed, surveying my surroundings. Whoever he was, he had died here. I turn to face the mirror in front of me and remove my hat. I had always disliked mirrors. It was if they could see my should and could suck me in. But, I had to see myself every now and then. I ruffle my long auburn hair and fix my eyeliner that had smudged with my finger. I always wore too much and my mom said it took away from the pure green of my eyes. I had considered tanning once and then received a smack from Violet for even thinking it. She said Elvira would be mad.

I throw my hat on the floor, feeling a large amount of iciness through my veins.

"I can't believe your actually here."

I turn around to see Violet sitting on my bed, her face still the same as it had been when she left a year ago. But I could tell it was cold and lonely, unlike the Violet I had once known. I wasn't shocked to see her, I had been expecting it, even welcoming it.

"You know I couldn't pass up something like this," I reply, laughing.

She smiles and its somewhat illuminating. She removes herself from the bed and suddenly I'm grabbing her for dear life. She wasn't warm, but she still hugged like Violet.

"Gods, I've missed you. I feared the worst. I knew when I hadn't heard from you something happened and then mom had a major vision about you guys. Then I got your text and that was that."

I let go of her and she tilts her head to look at me,"Yea, my dad kind of owes her an apology then."

"So, I didn't know ghosts had cell phones."

She laughs,"They don't."

I finally comprehend what she means and find myself twirling my hair.

"Mom's downstairs."

"You think she can help us?" Violet asks me and I look at her seriously.

"You know we won't stop until we figure this out. This place, Violet, I feel it. How can you stand it?"

She frowns,"I can't."

"I'm so sorry," I say finally and she eyes me with a look of pure Violet.

"For what? That I'm dead. Its old news. Nothing can be done now."

Before I can respond, I feel a sheet of overwhelming confusion come over me and turn to see a boy standing in the doorway. He was tall and handsome with dirty blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes. It was as if his face had been carved from angels, but the energy he gave off was heartbreaking.

"Who is this?" he said flatly and with no amount of emotion.

I looked over to Violet whose face became contorted with great dislike.

"I'm Azura," I said to the boy and he began strolling around the room, throwing glances at me.

"And what are you doing here?"

I folded my arms,"I live here."

He stopped pacing and looked dead at me.

"Is that so?"

"Azura, this is Tate and unfortunately, your going to be stuck with him." Violet said venomously.

I looked from one to the other, the energies from them radiating.

"I take it you two don't like each other?"

"That's an understatement," Violet spat as she glared at him.

Tate ruffles his hair,"That hurts Violet, you use to love me once. I know you still do."

"Your insane, Tate. A psychopath."

I watched as he clenched his fists and made his way back to the door. His eyes finding mine and I felt my spine shiver.

"Good luck here. You'll need it."

And then he was gone. The silence he left behind was insufferable.

I looked back at Violet, tears shining, but they did not pour.

"What was that all about? I asked bewildered.

Violet grabs my hand and looks at me, pleading.

"Azura, whatever you do, stay away from Tate. You have no idea what he's like, what he's done. He's the devil in disguise."

I look at her, my heart racing, feeling myself in some sort of denial.

_Why then did I sense good in him?_


	3. Through My Eyes

_"And I could run like a coward for the door,_

_But I'll never get out,_

_Your freaking me out."_

_-copeland, control freak_

* * *

><p><em>"<em>Azura! Wake up! Your going to be late!" I hear my mother yell up to me.

I groan and roll over, placing the soft pillow around my head until I feel someone tugging me.

"Alright! I'm getting up!" I huff, but take it back as soon as I see Violet smiling at me, "Oh its just you, nevermind then."

"Good morning to you too. Now get your ass up and get ready."

I stretch and yawn as I remove myself from my bed and trod over to my closet,"Since when have you encouraged me to go to school?"

Violet shifts her body to face me,"Since I decided it will get you out of this house."

I roll my eyes,"Vi, calm down. Your making me cold," I add sensing her,"You know me. I can handle myself."

"That's what you think," she sighs,"You know that I caught Tate watching you sleep last night?"

I nearly drop the dress I had selected for today before I spoke,"He was?"

"Yes, you don't understand what Tate is like."

"Then help me too. I really want to know what happened," I state, but she merely shakes it off.

"Go to school," and with that she vanishes from my view.

"Azura Juliet Talon! Get down here now!" My mother yells again, this time using my full name, which indicates for me that she is trying to be serious. I finish getting ready and throw one quick glance at the mirror before hurrying downstairs. As soon as I got to the last step however, there was a defining crack and laughter, which took me by surprise, and I caught sight of two red heads before they disappeared completely. Scowling at the stupidity of it, I finally made it into the kitchen only to find my mom sitting with-

"Vivien!" I yell and rush over to hug her. When we broke apart I caught her giving me a once over.

"Azura, you've grown too much."

I shrug slightly,"Well, you know me. Never stopping. Sorry it took me so long. I think we have some trouble makers here."

"Vivien was just giving me the info on this place. It seems we have quite a few unwanted ghosts," my mom chuckles, which doesn't shock me at all.

In the years of my life with my mom, the abnormal became normal and the strange became fascinating. I had obtained my senses at a young age and when mom had found out, she went over the top ecstatic. It was just me and mom for as long as I could remember and without her, my puzzle wasn't solved, the same as if I wasn't with her. I loved who I was and I loved that I could see what others couldn't.

I grab an apple from the fruit bowl,"Yea Violet was telling me, but she doesn't seem to keen on discussing certain subjects."

Vivien looks from my mother and then back at me,"Its been hard on Violet but its also not my place to say what happened to her. I'm sure she will tell you when the time is right."

I eye them both suspiciously. What was it that they knew? I could sense something was off, but didn't press on any further. I grab my car keys from the hook by the door before giving Vivien and my mother a hug good-bye.

"Please, no fighting this time," my mother says sternly, but I see she is trying not to smile as Vivien laughs.

"You and Violet are too much alike."

I throw a smirk at Vivien before I exit the kitchen,"Scary, isn't it?"

* * *

><p>Its not that I wasn't a good student, I just hated the whole idea of high school, even if I only had a year left, it was still utter torture. Stupid cliques and stupid football games and people comparing whose parents bought them the best car. Then again, I was in California now, which only made things worse. I was actually welcoming a fight at this point. The only thing that could sustain me was English, but they were already covering something I had already studied. Perhaps I could make everyone else look stupid?<p>

"Ms. Talon?" I hear the teachers voice come into focus, causing me to look up,"Are you with us?"

I look around the room, every stupid face on mine,"Yes, sir. I'm with you."

He looks at me as if I'm some inferior child,"Then would you mind telling us what Shakespeare meant when he wrote "Out damned spot?" in Macbeth?"

I smile, somewhat entertained,"Lady Macbeth's husband has killed the king of Scotland at her urging, but her guilt over the murder gradually drives her insane. When she speaks this line she is sleepwalking, and she imagines that a spot of the king's blood stains her hand."

The silence from the man before me gives me immense satisfaction just as the bell rings.

"Class dismissed," he says quietly before slumping over to his desk.

I swing my bag over my shoulder and exit the prison, as a boy with dark black hair and green eyes strides over next to me.

"Can I help you?" I ask, stopping to look at him.

"It's Azura right?"

I stare at him blankly, finally getting a good look at him. He was tall and his face was defined, and his eyes had a somewhat dreamy expression to them. He was almost as good looking as Tate. Wait-why was I thinking about Tate's looks right now? I snap myself back into reality, knowing how the dangers of my mind worked.

"Yea, I'm Azura."

He holds out his hand and I take it reluctantly. No boy had ever given me a handshake as a greeting and it took me off guard.

"So you just moved here?" He asks, sounding mildly interested. The crowds of students were rushing past us to get to lunch and I felt somewhat annoyed by being placed in the center of this.

"Uh, yea-from Boston. Listen, not to be rude or anything, but I kind of wanted to get to the library."

I see his smile falter a little and I feel like a bitch.

"It's cool. I understand. Well, I guess I'll see you around then?"

I nod politely before heading in the opposite direction. It hadn't been a lie that I was going to the library during lunch. It had been a habit of mine since I could remember. Violet would come with me on occasion, hoping to read about some kind of Russian mean of torture. I was more for myths and legends than anything else. The library was way too quiet when I entered, and I could of sworn I heard my footsteps echo as I made my way to the fantasy section. It was uncommonly cold as well, almost dead-like. Dead-like? Why should it feel like that here?

"Shut up Steph!" I heard a voice yell and looked throughout the book shelves to see a group of students gathered at a table in the far corner. It was as if a wave of ice cold water washed over me. I could feel my heart thump in my chest as my skin grew colder. I closed my eyes, images filling up my mind. The very library I was in at that moment. I couldn't see his face, but I saw the gun. I saw them fending for their lives. The blood was everywhere. I heard the screaming and the gun shots. I reached out to try and stop him…one after the other they went down.

"Stop it!" I yelled, but I knew he couldn't hear me as he approached the last girl under the table.

"Please! No! Why?" she cried, the tears overwhelming.

"BAM!"

I opened my eyes. The quiet library coming into view once more. I looked back through the shelves to see them all siting there still. They were dead. All of them. I had been there just moments ago when it happened. But, it must have been years ago. Were they unable to move on as well. Trapped for a never-ending eternity just like Violet?

"Seriously Chloe, get a grip. I was just joking," the blonde girl snapped back at the brunette one, who folded her arms smugly. I couldn't help but realize who they all looked like together; The Dead Breakfast Club. The blonde one was the basket case, clearly, her dark clothes giving her away. The brunette ones was a cheerleader, and obviously a princess in her peoples eyes. The boy with short light brown hair was wearing a jock jacket. The boy with dark curly hair and glasses was plainly the brain and the last boy who had neck length dark brown hair was certainly the rebel.

"Give it a rest you two," the jock said,"You two have been giving me headaches for years now."

"Kyle my man," the rebel responded,"They're women. We are forever cursed."

"Oh shut up!" The two girls spat back.

Slowly and without alarming them, I made myself noticeable.

"You guys may want to keep it down. You are in a library."

The looks on they're faces were indeed alarming, even though I had not intended it. They probably didn't realize anyone could see them, let alone hear them.

"Did she just talk to us?" The princess asked, looking from the others then back at me.

"Wait-you can see us?" The jock said standing up and getting rather close to me. I could feel how cold they all were and drew my jacket closer around me.

"Yes, I can see you. Don't freak out."

"Who the hell are you?" The basket case questioned, angrily and soon they were all surrounding me.

"I'm Azura. I just moved here. I usually go to the library during lunch. I didn't mean to interrupt your little pow-wow."

The brain laughed before speaking,"Eternity isn't a pow-wow. In case you haven't noticed, we are dead."

I smiled,"Yea, I think I got that part down. I'm a medium. So is my mom. We just moved into the Murder House."

I saw they're faces contort with fury.

"A medium?" The basket case replies,"Jesus fucking Christ."

"You mean you live with that bastard Tate Langdon?" The jock questioned. The resentment in his voice was audible.

"There's a lot of ghosts there, but yea, Tate is there. Why?"

None of them answer and I see a tear fall from the princess.

"I know what happened to you guys. I saw it all, right before I talked to you. I'm so sorry. I know that you can never get your lives back."

The jock turns away from me before speaking and his voice is as cold as his energy,"You can thank Tate for that."

I feel my heart drop into my chest,"Tate? Tate did this?"

"Oh, so you saw everything but the person who murdered us?" The princess yells.

"I-sometimes-I can't control what I see. There's got to be an explanation for why he went off like that," I see they're faces become angrier and I continue on, quickly,"Not that I'm justifying what he did or anything."

So why was I trying to find a reason for Tate? I didn't even know him. To everyone I knew so far, he was some kind of monster. He was a murderer. But why? Why did I sense good in him?

"I want to help you guys." I blurt out suddenly, making them all look at me like I'm insane and truth be told, maybe I was.

"Help us?" The rebel asks, unsure,"Help us how?"

I stumble over my words trying to find the right ones that don't sound lame,"Crossover, obviously."

I half expected them to laugh at me, but they don't. They only eye me curiously and I sense hope radiate off them.

"You can really do that?" The brain inquires and I nod.

"Yes, I really can. Its what I do. If you'll let me. I know you don't know me, but I've seen what happened and I can feel what you feel. Just, let me try. I doubt you can bare an eternity like this."

They don't answer right away and after a few minutes I consider walking away until the jock extends his hand out to me, reminding me of the boy from earlier.

"I'm Kyle."

I take his hand and shake it.

"And this is Chloe," he points to the princess who smiles faintly,"This is Amir," he points to the brain who nods,"Kevin,"he points to the rebel,"And finally, Stephanie." he points to the basket case who is glaring at me,"We are always here."

"I understand," I reply as Stephanie approaches me.

"Look, I don't think I like you and I sure as hell don't trust you, but I'll buy into this crap because its pretty much my last option."

"Cool it Steph," Kevin growls, causing her to back away from me. I hear the bell ring overhead.

"I better get going. I'll see you guys later."

I sling my bag over my shoulder and make my way for the door before I hear Kyle speak.

"Hey, be careful in that place. You don't want to be dead. Trust me."

I watch them deteriorate before my eyes before heading out the door and to my car, thinking about what Kyle just were boxed in. All of them. Unable to move on and forced to spend eternity with the memory of how they died. How long did it feel like for Violet? For every lost soul that wandered the earth? But, even if Violet was able to move on, the force of the house kept them there and that was what I needed to stop in order for her to escape. Even though I would lose her forever.

I finally make it home and shut the engine of my car off, sitting still for several minutes, just listening to my shallow breathing. What if I couldn't find out how to help them crossover? What if I couldn't help anyone in the house? I knew I was being silly, however. I had helped spirits crossover before, although it had never been so advanced before. The house contained the essence of evil, a force unlike anything I had ever felt before and yet, I still sensed good. Just like I had with Tate.

"Are you thinking about me?" A soft voice whispered from behind me and I felt my body go numb. I looked up into the mirror, only to see Tate smiling devishly back at me, his eyes boring into mine.

_The world is a filthy place. It's a filthy goddamn horror show._

_*reviews are loved and so are you =]*_


	4. Devil

_She locks all the doors and turns, says, _

_"We will always be safe here in this bed"_

_All I see scares me, and no one waits forever_

_-lydia, all i see_

* * *

><p>"Tate! What the fuck are you doing in my car?" I yell furiously and remove myself from the vehicle as Tate reappears in front of me. blocking my way.<p>

"Did I scare you?" And I hear the tone of hope in his voice and it sidetracks me slightly.

"No. You can't scare me. Not like that at least," I add as I make my way around him and up to the front door. He follows me as I search for my key.

"You sound just like Violet. Women are pathetic. I know your type. You act like nothing phases you, when in reality, your chicken shit deep down inside."

I stop fumbling for my key and look up into his eyes. They are cold and hurtful, his energy becoming more and more dark and it does take me off guard, considering I had sensed good in him not long ago.

"You don't know me Tate," my voice becoming spiteful,"I can't say the same for you though. I can sense you, you know? I know what you did in 1994. I talked to those kids at school today. But, for some reason, I don't buy into it fully. Why did you do it? Mommy or Daddy issues?"

The force of him pushing me against the brick wall is overwhelming I barely had time to react. I could feel his breath on my lips, the coldness of his skin against my own. In all the time I had dealt with the undead, I had never experienced it like this. I had never been the least bit afraid, but I was. Deep down, and I hated myself for agreeing with him, deep down I was afraid for the first time. Afraid of Tate, but also entranced by him.

"Shut your fucking mouth," Tate snarled,"You don't know anything. I don't even remember it. I heard it from Violet last year. The year she left me. I've been eavesdropping, trying to learn more about you. I know about your dad. How he left you and your stupid mother. I know how you got expelled from school for almost clawing a girls eye out. I know how you and Violet are best friends and how devastated you were when she moved. I know about you being a medium. What bullshit. You think you can save her after what she's done, what I've done? You think you can save any of us? I've watched you since you've been here. You might as well kill yourself."

He lifts up my sleeve trying to find some kind of wounds that had been self-inflicted, but looks back at me wide eyes when he doesn't find them.

"I've never cut myself. That's Violet," I say softly and somewhat calmly,"I was never one for self-mutilation. My pain is inside and its enough."

_There's so much pain, you know? There's so much._

"Let me go Tate," I say to his speechlessness and surprisingly he releases me. I resume my search for my key and unlock the door when I finally find it. But Tate did not follow me any longer, having vanished as I closed the door. I ran up to my room as fast as I could, not even wondering if my mother was home. I needed to know the truth, as I thought of Tate and Violet and the souls I had encountered. I needed to know everything.

* * *

><p><em>"I like birds too." Tate says quietly.<em>

_"Why do you like them?" Violet questions solemnly._

_"Because they can fly away when things get to crazy I guess."_

_There's a long pause before he speaks again._

_"Are you gonna tell your parents? About the pills?"_

_Violet ponders for a minute,"No. I've been sleeping a lot. They think I'm depressed."_

_"Are you?"_

_"I'm sad."_

_"Me too," Tate replies sorrowfully. The look in his eyes is heartbreaking._

_"Violet? Something's changed in you-toward me. Your distant, cold. And I don't know what I've done, but I'll leave you alone from now on if that's what you want. Is that what you want?"_

_He waits for a reply but continues on when she doesn't speak._

_"You know why I don't leave you alone? Because I care about your feelings more than mine. I love you. There. I said it. Not just on some chalkboard. I would never let anyone or anything hurt you. I've never felt that way about anyone."_

_A tear streaks down Violet's face as she beckons Tate into the bed with her, her arms cradling him like some sort of shelter._

_"I'm tired," he whispers._

_Violets grip becomes tighter on him._

_"Me too."_

* * *

><p>I wake up abruptly. My room is pitch black, the sound of crickets filling my ears. I hadn't even realized I had fell asleep. I turn my light on next to my bed and take one quick look around my room before feeling my forehead. I felt extremely hot and opened the window behind me in an effort to breathe, going over the dream in my head. Tate and Violet. Violet and Tate. It wasn't a dream. It was the past.<p>

_You use to love me once._

Once. Use too. Why had she left him? Why hadn't Violet told me yet? I retrieve the aspirin off my dresser and pop two into my mouth, thinking about the pills that Violet had taken. And then it hits me. No, there was no way. She wasn't stupid enough to kill herself. I would have known right away how she had died. Then why didn't I? Why didn't I see it? How horrible was I not to realize it? I feel the bile in my throat rise and vomit in my trash can, wiping my mouth on my sleeve, I sink onto the floor. There would be no school tomorrow for me. I always knew when my body wasn't functioning normally, and mom always knew it too.

"Azura, honey are you alright?" I hear my mom ask through the door.

"You can come in," I state and she opens the door slowly.

"Your sick aren't you?" she inquires and I nod as I make my way back into bed.

"You can stay home tomorrow."

"I was planning on it," I groan.

"Something else is wrong."

Damn her for always knowing everything.

"Mom, can I ask you something?"

She shifts herself on my bed and eyes me playfully.

"Of course."

"Is it possible for a person to be possessed even after death?"

My mom raises her eyebrow,"By what? Demons?"

"Well, yes, and the Devil."

My mom opens her mouth, then closes it, then opens it again,"There are certain cases I know of that pertain to spiritual possession. It isn't unknown, but its very rare. Its said that the devil sometimes latches on to the weak, but also the ones that will give him what he desires most. If the Devil finds his match, I assure you, he will hold onto him even in the afterlife, keeping the spirit incapable of moving on."

I frown slightly.

"Is this about someone in the house?"

I look up at her suddenly,"I was just curious. I sensed something in one of the spirits here and it confused me. I mean, you are saying its possible? I mean can a spirit's soul be saved if it wasn't their soul in the first place? Could they be saved?"

My mother grabs my hand and squeezes it,"Tate is an unusual spirit. I cannot sense him like you can, I suppose. I have heard of the things he's done from Vivien, and they are unforgivable things, heinous things."

"How did you know it was Tate?" I asked shocked.

"I'm your mother and that boy is full of evil. If the Devil is working his magic, your going to have a hard time proving it. He doesn't want to be found."

She kisses me on my forehead before whispering goodnight and departing. My mind racing, I felt it glued solely on Tate. What else had he done that was unforgivable? Disturbing images flash before my eyes and I shake my head violently to snap myself out of it. The Devil is the essence of evil and so was this house and so was Tate. I could connect the dots. Was it never so obvious? I bury myself under the sheets, pulling them closer to me, feeling the safety of them. I think of Tate's face. How beautiful it is, how alluring and it hits me then.

_The Devil is beautiful_


	5. Sickness

_Chasing after shadows,_

_Living with the ghosts_

_-hammock_

* * *

><p>I aways wondered what happened after people died. Did heaven exist? Surely it did if the Devil himself was around, but what if life was just cruel like that? What if there was only the Devil? I had sat wide awake for the remainder of the day, slowly wasting away in my mind. Had everything always been this way? I reach for my myths book on my nightstand and skim through it, the fearful and elaborate artwork burning my eyes. There was no doubt that everything I knew was real and there was certainly something about the state of Tate's soul. I had been online all day looking up the history of it all, cases from around the world that dealt with demonic possession. I had never considered that evil spirits I had encountered may have just been puppets for someone else, I just considered they were wired that way. I should have known better. Had all these people been weak though? Or perhaps they were chosen based on their belief in God, because of how devoted they were to their faith. The Devil would enjoy stripping away someones love for the one who banished him.<p>

"You've been reading all day," a quiet voice spoke out and I looked up to see Tate standing at the foot of the bed.

I closed the book and tossed it aside.

"I like to read. Television rots the mind if you consume too much of it."

He shrugs,"I like reading too."

I stare at him wonderingly,"What do you like to read?"

"Adventures mostly. Sometimes horror. I like reading about birds."

_I like birds too_

I feel the hair on my neck stand up, but smile slightly,"Yea, me too. Mostly because they can fly away whenever they want."

And I truly meant this as I watched his face become clouded with sadness. I had always admired birds because of this sole purpose.

"I told Violet I liked birds once. It was because of that too. I wanted to fly away even after I died. I would run for hours and hours trying to leave the house, but I would end up right back where I started. Like I was in a never-ending spiral. Violet never told you about us yet, did she? She never told you what I did?"

I shake my head slowly feeling intoxicated by his energy. It was as if I could feel my heart breaking as well. The tears in his eyes weren't vacant.

"I was never one to press on. I always wait till she is ready. Although, I already figured out that you two were in love. I also know that you've done horrible things, one I'm already aware of, the others I don't know. It's not my place to ask yet."

He edges closer to the bed,"I don't remember much before I died. I don't remember going to the school and killing those kids. Sometimes I sit alone and I pound my head against the wall until I bleed, trying to remember it, but I can't. I need you to believe that."

I look at him puzzled. Why all of a sudden was he talking this way to me? Why did he need me to believe him? Was he so far gone from losing Violet that he just needed someone to listen? What would Violet make of this, of me being so close to Tate?

"I believe you."

"What?" He looks up shocked.

"I believe you," I respond flatly.

Several seconds pass before he opens his mouth again.

"Do you think Violet will ever talk to me again?"

I look down at my hands and back up at him,"I can't be the judge of that. At least not yet."

He nods in agreement before he vanishes from my view. I breath in deeply before removing myself from my bed and making my way downstairs and into the kitchen.

"Hello, Moira." I smile at the red-headed maid who smiles back.

"Feeling any better, Azura?"

I sit down and fill my mug up with hot water,"A little. Stomachs still acting funny, but I'm sure I'll survive."

Moria stops cleaning and takes a seat next to me,"It could be worse. At least you aren't dead."

I turn to face her as I fill another mug up,"What's it like?"

She cocks her head at me,"Being dead? Well, it doesn't hurt physically, but emotionally, it destroys you. Especially since we aren't normal spirits that can come and go when they please. We'e stuck, as you know, but hopefully your mother can deliver like she said. I pray that much is possible. Especially for your Violet."

I look into the dark liquid in my mug,"I hope so too."

"I hear that you have taken an interest in Tate."

My head snaps up to look at her,"No, not like that. I don't know what mom said, but its not what you think."

She eyes me carefully,"Oh, no I understand. I just think you should know your limitations."

"Meaning?"

"You can't save everyone, Azura. Especially Tate and if you could, he doesn't deserve to move on anywhere special. He deserves to be the way he is now. Alone."

I frown at her,"No one deserves to be alone if they are able to love. Tate loved Violet."

Moira stands up,"And look where that got her."

I stare after her as she exits the kitchen, my face growing hot. Was I a fool? I knew who I was and I damned well wasn't going to let Moira influence me otherwise. Disgusted, I left the kitchen and was about to make my way to my room when I heard muffled crying coming from the basement. I had never been down there yet, Violet told me to avoid it, but curiosity always caught me and I opened the door, quietly walking down each step as the crying grew louder. The air became 20 degrees colder all of a sudden and I tried warming my arms up as I hit the solid ground below, and hitting the light switch, which only casted a slight glow.

"Hello?"

But the crying simply continued as I made my way forward into the unknown.

"Hello?" I tried again,"Um, are you okay?"

As I drifted ahead more, I saw a lady sitting huddled in the corner, her head hung low. I could tell she wasn't from this time period, her elegant curls, accenting her radiant facial features. Her dress looked old-fashioned, maybe from the early 1900's, it was hard to tell in this light. She looked up, suddenly aware that I was standing there watching.

"I wanted a baby," she whispered,"I thought it would make the pain go away. But when he gave me one, it just ruined me further. Am I stuck this way? Am I to feel this pain forever?"

She grabbed onto me tightly, her blue eyes penetrating mine and I felt sicker than I had before.

"Please tell me what to do? Would you stay with me? I'm so alone. I could take care of you."

I tried to shake her off, but her grip did not loosen.

"I already have a mother. I'm sorry."

She sobbed harder, reality hitting her in the face once more,"Yes, how silly of me. Of course you do. Please forgive me. I thought I wanted my baby back. He gave me one."

I felt her nails digging into my skin,"Yes, I know. You said that. Please, let me go now."

"Why do you want to leave me!" She cried loudly and she began to shake me. The blood began to rush to my head,"Why!"

"Nora! Let her go! Now!" A firm voice yelled and she vanished at once. I could feel where her nails cut my flesh and felt the warmness of someones hand skim over them.

"Did she hurt you?"

I looked up to see Tate surveying me for my response.

"No, I'm fine. She just, took me by surprise."

He stopped touching me and looked at me seriously.

"You shouldn't come down here. At least not alone. There's things down here that won't welcome you."

"I'm sorry," I whisper,"Is she going to be alright?"

He tries to smile,"Nora's always like that. She'll be fine."

"What happened to her baby?" I question as he begins to walk away.

He turns his head slightly to look at me,"Long story short, it was murdered. Sent to her in pieces in a jar. Her husband was a doctor and he tried to bring it back to life using other parts, but what he created wasn't human, and it still hides in this basement."

I looked at him horrified,"That's sick."

"The world's a sick place, Azura. It always will be."

Before I could say anything else he was gone and I felt myself running up the stairs, locking the basement door behind me, just as the doorbell rang. I looked in the mirror to make sure I didn't look like death before opening the door, only to find the boy from school the other day standing there.

"Hey, uh, I brought you your homework from English. Sorry I didn't mean to just show up, but I didn't have your number."

I look at him awkwardly,"Uh, its fine. How did you know where I live?"

"Its been all over the school that you moved in here. I'm Oliver by the way."

"Thanks for bringing me my homework,"I state as he hands it to me,"Its really nice of you."

"No problem. So, they say this place is haunted, you know?"

I smile at him,"You don't know the half of it."

"Yea, I can see. You look like you've seen ghost today. You look terrible. No offense."

"None taken. I guess I'll head back to bed. Thanks again."

I start to close the door before he speaks again.

"Hey, so I was just wondering, there's a halloween thing in town in a few weeks and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me?"

I stare at him blankly,"Oh uh, I think my best friend is coming into town then. You see, she can only hang out around that time and I promised her that we would do something."

I watch his expression become unhopeful,"Oh cool. Yea. Well, I'll see you at school tomorrow. Later."

"Later."

I lock the door behind me and stare at the floor in front of me. I hadn't lied to him, technically. It was the only time Violet could leave the house and I was planning on taking her out to do whatever she wanted. But I still had the guilty feeling in the pit of my stomach. It wasn't that I wasn't interested in starting something with someone, I was afraid of the rejection that came with it. What would he think if he found out about me? LIke so many others before him, they had dropped me and looked the other way. In truth, I preferred the dead over the living. They were the only ones that truly understood me. It was a dangerous game laying the heart on the table for someone to pick up. Look at Tate and Violet. I had alway been one for hopeless romance like Romeo and Juliet. I loved the idea of love. But look at them. Feeling the energy from Tate was simply painful. And I had been there before and I didn't want that ever again. I didn't want it for anyone. I didn't want it for Tate.

_Why?_


	6. Monster

_Blue jeans, white shirt_

_Walked into the room_

_You know you make my eyes burn_

_It was like James Dean for sure_

_You're so fresh to death and sick as ca-cancer_

_-lana del rey, blue jeans_

* * *

><p>"Do you like him?"<p>

I spun around on the spot to see Tate leaning against my closet door, his eyes locked on mine and I felt a burning sensation.

"Tate, you can't just keep coming in here whenever you want to."

He strided over to my bed and laid on it, a taunting look in his eyes.

"It use to be my room, then it was Violet's. I'm rather disappointed with the color scheme in here now."

I surveyed the midnight blue walls around me, completely happy with the color that graced the walls.

"I like blue. Midnight blue reminds me of the night sky. You don't like the stars?"

He snorted,"Stars? Really? Please."

Frustrated, I smacked his feet off my bed,"Get out, now."

He stood up suddenly so that his face was inches from mine.

"I don't think that guy is for you. He's too nice."

I laughed devishly,"Oh give me a break and I said get out! I don't even have any interest in boys at the present time."

Still he got closer so that I felt myself almost against the wall.

"I'm sorry about the other day. What I said to you," he almost purred in a sort of seductive tone. I could feel the goosebumps on my body.

"Um, okay? That's fine. I don't really care."

"I'm trying to be nice."

"And I'm trying to get you to leave. I'm tired."

He backed away and walked over to my dresser, picking up the photo I kept of my family and the Harmons. At least, the family I use to have. I had remembered exactly when it had been taken. My 13th birthday. Mom had gone all out, since that was the day I gained my sight. The photographer had thrown a fit because we insisted that he get all of us in. I had thrown a giant tantrum until he finally gave in.

"Who is this guy in the picture? And this girl?" Tate asked pointing to the two figures next to me on the left.

"That's Violet. Can't you tell?"

He looked at the picture closely.

"She was younger here. I didn't even recognize her. So who is this guy?"

I squirmed uncomfortably.

"That's Marius. He's-I mean he was my mom's fiancee."

"What happened to him?" Tate asked me and he sounded almost concerned.

"He died. A week before the wedding."

Tate put the picture back and looked at me intensely.

"I'm sorry. What happened?"

I take a sharp intake of breath. I had never talked about Marius to anyone after he died. He was, in my mind, my true father. My flesh and blood, even though he hadn't helped create me. After he died, it left an unavoidable void.

"He was murdered. I've never talked about him after he died. It hurt too much. It still hurts."

Tate's eyes didn't leave mine.

"Did they catch the guy?"

I sat on my bed, my head spinning,"No. I assume he's well out of reach by now."

A sinking feeling next to me let me know Tate had sat down and I looked up at him then. I didn't feel as cold around him as I usually did. There was some sort of warmness to him at the moment, especially in the way he looked at me.

"The world is shit. Don't tell me its not. But, there a few exceptions. Like you and Violet for instance, or your mom. I know what its like to lose something. You can spend your whole life trying to figure out why, but in the end you realize you just wasted your whole life thinking about that single question."

I stared at him curiously,"Why are you being so nice?"

He seemed to think for a moment before answering.

"I want to be a good person. I'm not like this."

"Like what?"

"A monster."

I take his hand in mine and it feels strangely right.

"I don't think your a monster. I think something else is. You say you didn't remember anything until Violet told you, right?"

He nods and I continue on,"Tate, I think you've been controlled by something."

He pulls away from me,"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the Devil."

"Your crazy," he laughs and I feel offended.

"How am I crazy? How can that not be a possibility? Your stuck in a house thats filled with ghosts and an unimaginable amount of evil. I thought you'd want some kind of an excuse to get Violet to take you back as well."

'She'll never take me back. Devil or no Devil. As far as she's concerned, I'm exactly that," he whispered as he stood up.

I watched him then, wondering about what was going on in the spaces of his mind. He was broken beyond repair, that much was obvious.

"Your right by the way, he is too nice."

And he smiled then, a genuine smile before I watched him fade away and finally succumb to sleep.

* * *

><p>The next week passed by slowly and miserably. I had encountered far more ghosts in the house than I ever expected too, was overloaded with schoolwork, met with dead kids during lunch, helped Moira clean, hung around with Violet and pretty much kept trying to get my mind off Tate. I had even asked Dr. Harmon to give me a session, just to see if my head was in order, but he simply said he could no longer be considered a doctor. I was pretty taken aback by this, and still had no idea about what had really transpired, even though I tried to find a way to get it out of Violet without her realizing it. She wasn't stupid, of course. I hadn't spoken to Tate since the encounter in my room and my relationship with the dead breakfast club was becoming more in depth. Helping them crossover wasn't going to be easy as I thought it would be.<p>

_"We need to know why," Chloe had said to me,"I need closure. Its why I'm stuck. I need to know my parents are alright."_

But how could I do that when Tate didn't even remember committing the acts he was killed for? How was he going to remember? I feared for Halloween, which was in a week. I was certain that they would come looking for Tate and then what? Could I keep them away? Would they listen if they knew I was going to get them to crossover?A million thoughts in my mind, and no way to answer them. Was this house driving me insane?

It wasn't until saturday morning that I had decided to get out and sit under the tree in the yard and attempt to write, that a skinny blonde-haired woman approached the gate with her little annoying dog.

"My, my. Aren't you a lovely thing?" she purred with a southern drawl that made my ears bleed.

I looked at her oddly, my eyebrow raised.

"Oh, how silly of me,"she said waving her cigarette around with a sort of grace and I wondered if she had been in pageants,"I'm Constance. I live next door. You must be the young lady who's mother I've heard all about around town. It's Azura isn't it? Interesting name."

I didn't move,"Thanks. It means sky blue."

"Charming. So, how do you like the house? I use to live here myself, but moved after a series of misfortune. Then that other lovely family moved in."

"The Harmons," I replied,"Yes I know. Violet's my best friend."

She looked at me suddenly with a hint of fear.

"Oh-I see. So unfortunate what happened to them. Tell me, how are they doing since then?"

"You know about the house then?" I asked curiously.

She laughed in a high pitched tone,"Dear, I did live there, didn't I? The house makes you a believer. Although, I don't think I'll ever step foot inside again. Too much pain for me."

"What happened to Violet?"

The question took her off guard.

"You mean you don't know? Surely-I assumed you knew everything."

I frowned as I stood up to meet her by the gate.

"No, I only know some things. I was waiting till she was ready. Tate told me that they dated. He's a ghost here. I know he's not welcome by the others but I talk to him anyway."

Her face becomes stony and I don't know what to make of it.

"Well, that's very sweet of you, but, sadly,its not my place to gossip." She begins to walk away,"Well, it was nice meeting you dear. I expect I'll see more of you quite soon."

"Wait!" I cry out and she spins around,"Can't you tell me anything? I'm trying to help in there and I feel like everyone is keeping something from me. I know you know something, obviously."

The cigarette in her hand was beyond use now, but she still kept it between her fingers as she stared at me with glassy eyes.

"If I were you, I'd leave and never come back. There's nothing for you here and nothing you can do. If Dr. Harmon hadn't been so blind and listened, then maybe they would still be alive. The house will consume you, blind you, take over your very soul if it has darkness in it. Tate is a perfect example. You will never save that boy. I've already tried."

She says the last line with pure bitterness as she makes her way back inside her house, the door slamming behind her. I stood there staring after her wake before finally heading back inside, my mind on the verge of exploding, only to find Violet and everyone else, waiting for me.

* * *

><p>"What did that bitch want?" Violet asks me, annoyance clear in her tone.<p>

I walk into the living room, Vivien, Ben and Violet following me. I slump into the big armchair by the fireplace and massage my head.

"She was just saying hello," I mumble.

"Did she ask about us," Vivien requests and I look up to face her.

"Yea, she did actually. Which reminds me, I want to know what happened to you guys. I want the truth. I can't help if you don't open up to me and its not fair that my own mother knows over me. I matter too."

Vivien puts her arm around me as Violet looks down at the floor and Ben begins to pace. Vivien looks at Ben who nods in understanding and takes a seat next to me.

"First off, you need to stay away from Constance. Don't let her anywhere near you or this house. Do you understand?"

I stare at him blankly,"Yes, but-"

"I'll explain it to you soon," He says, cutting me off,"There's a lot you need to know and there are things I'm not proud of, Azura. If I had payed attention more maybe Violet and Vivien would still be alive."

"Dad, stop it. It wasn't your fault. It was that bitch. It was Tate." Violet said as she sat down next to him.

Ben tried to stifle a sob,"I'm sorry. It's just something that will always remain in my mind."

"Azura," Vivien said softly, catching my attention. The light that shown through the window made the red of her hair glow and the light danced in my eyes,"What you need to understand is, is that what happened to us was unavoidable and its not Ben's fault. I was pregnant, as I'm sure Violet told you, with twins."

I nod, having remember this being one of the last few conversations I had with Violet.

"What you don't know," she went on,"Was that one of them wasn't mine. I was raped."

I felt my heart stop as I looked at her speechless,"Raped? How?"

I caught Violet's eye and she looked away from me, pure malice on her face.

"Tate," Vivien said and I felt my insides explode.

"T-ate?" I could barely get the words out,"Why would he do that?"

"For Nora. He wanted to give her the baby that she lost. Unfortunetly, one of the babies died and the other one was kidnapped. One baby consumed the others life force, and that's the one that was taken after Ben was murdered."

I whipped my head to look at Ben,"Murdered? By who?"

"A bitch named Hayden,"Violet spat,"She's stuck here too. Everyone was after the twins. Even Constance. She wouldn't pass up her grandson. Dad tried to leave but it was too late. I've got a pretty good idea where that baby is."

I shook my head, trying to drink all of this is in,"Constance is Tate's mother?"

They all nod and I feel like someone had hit me in the face with a brick. I was in shock, pure denial. How could Tate have done this? Unless it wasn't Tate. Yes, that had to be it. No one was that evil. Maybe my theory was true after all. I had seen the good in him, sensed it. But then, there was the evidence of his acts right in front of me. How insane was I not to accept it? And who exactly was Hayden. Had Constance really stolen the other baby?

"So then what about you?" I ask, finally turning to Violet,"Who killed you?"

There was a short silence and before she even spoke I knew what was going to leave her lips.

"Me."

_Don't you die on me Violet!_


	7. Trick or Treat: Halloween Pt1

_**A/N:** Thank you all so much for reading this. my mind is so beyond reality and i'm glad you all share the same interests. please read and review!_

* * *

><p><em>Those who are dead are not dead <em>

_They're just living in my head _

_And since I fell for that spell _

_I am living there as well _

_Oh.. _

_Time is so short and I'm sure _

_There must be something more _

_-Coldplay, 42_

* * *

><p>"Why didn't you tell me!" I yelled loudly at Violet as I slammed my bedroom door closed. Violet looked at me as if she was bored.<p>

"Because I didn't want you to know!"

I threw my arms up in frustration,"Are you fucking kidding me? Your suppose to tell me everything! Now I feel like my mind has entered an alternate universe!"

She stood rooted to the spot, her eyes not leaving mine,"I'm so sorry I'm not living up to your expectations."

I folded my arms,"What the hell is that suppose to mean?"

"Nothing," she huffed as she walked over to the window, her eyes locked on something in the distance. I was lost for words. I had finally learned the gut wrenching truth about what happened to my best friend, and yet I didn't accept that it was the whole truth. There was something more to it all and I kept thinking that over and over in my head.

"Tate tried to save me," Violet whispers and I look up at her, her eyes searching mine,"He brought me into the bathroom and tried to get me to vomit the pills up, but I took to many."

I stood there as I listened to her talk, my heart racing,"He loves you."

She laughs sorrowfully,"It doesn't change what he's done. He murdered people, Azura. He murdered my mother. How can you defend him?"

"I'm not defending him, there's something else going on, I can feel it."

She rolls her eyes,"I'm not stupid. I know you two have been chatting. I can't blame you for falling for it, though. I thought after you found out the truth, however, you would go in the other direction."

I don't know how to respond as she looks back out the window. I felt horrible for the way I felt about Tate, but I couldn't help it. It was my job to save souls wasn't it? But, Violet and everyone being disappointed in me, was one thing I couldn't bare. Maybe Moira and Constance were right. Maybe I needed to accept my limitations, but mom always told me to keep going and fuck what others told me. Tate had murdered people and raped Vivien, committed acts that were unthinkable, and yet, he still had a place inside my mind and I could start to feel him creep into my heart and it terrified me.

"I never thought anything like this would happen,"I said softly,"I never thought you would kill yourself."

"Its Tate's fault," she snaps at me, her eyes filled with anger.

"Tate didn't shove those pills down your throat," I argue back,"I knew I should have came to visit. I knew something was wrong when you started cutting again. How could I be so idiotic?"

She finally walks over to me and grabs my hands in hers,"You aren't an idiot. I just don't want you to be where I am. I just want you to see the truth."

I dare not look up at her because her energy hurts enough as it is and I know her eyes are just the same.

"I'm trying too. But Violet, you need to trust me. Something isn't right here. I don't feel complete evil from Tate. I really think something is inside him. Something not from this world."

I finally meet her gaze and its full of confusion,"The darkness took him long ago."

I let go of her hands and begin pacing,"But he loved you, Violet! A person consumed completely by darkness wouldn't be able to love the way he did."

"I know he loved me," she says firmly,"It still doesn't make a difference. You can keep trying to find a reason for Tate, I'll never understand why, but its not going to fix anything."

I sigh heavily,"I need you to be here for me. I need you. Your my best friend and you know better than anyone that I can't let this go."

Surprisingly she smiles,"Always the stubborn one."

I force a smile back and she takes a deep breath as well.

"I'm sorry, Azura. But, I'll never forgive him. This is your decision and I'll be here for you, but Tate will never exist for me. I need your help too though, remember?"

"Of course," I say taken aback that she could even think that I'd forget,"I told you no matter what."

She nods and opens my bedroom door,"Don't let it take you too."

As she disappears I comprehend what she means and it makes me feel more conflicted than before. I felt as if I was letting everyone down. I had promised to save them. All of them. Something was eating away at the back of my mind. I felt that in order to save Violet, I had to save Tate first, as if everything was connected to him. If Tate was indeed possessed, and I knew he was, then it would mean that the darkness in these walls, were the workings of the very pit of evil. It would mean the true reason the souls were forever trapped here. The only problem was, how do you destroy the Devil?

* * *

><p>When Saturday morning came, it also meant Halloween. The day before I had asked Kyle and the others to not pursue Tate, and after a half an hour of arguing, they finally understood. Although, somewhere deep inside I had mainly done it because I was concerned for Tate's safety and I thought I was sick for wanting that.<p>

_"He doesn't remember so its no good trying to force it out of him. Let me deal with this. It won't happen over night. Just use your day wisely. Its not often you get to enjoy something," I had said to them._

I woke up at 9 am and dressed quickly, not wanting to waste any time, and rushed downstairs to eat.

"Where's the fire?" mom laughs as I sit down next to Violet who is already there with Vivien, Ben and Moira.

"Its Halloween," I reply as I take a large bite of my oatmeal,"I plan on being out all day with this one over here," I nod my head at Violet,"What are you guys doing?"

Vivien takes Ben's hand into her own and I smile,"We were planning on going to see the city, maybe get some dinner. Your mom has some work to do today."

"I figured since I can leave the house whenever, you all should enjoy your day Lily free," my mom says cheerfully,"I have a client to go see in town."

"Where's the little one?" I ask as I look around for the baby, but frown when I don't see him.

"He's asleep upstairs," Ben replies.

"Ah. Alright then."

"Azura, dear,"Moira begins,"Would you mind helping me tomorrow with some things around the house? That is, if you aren't to tired from your escapades tonight."

I smile broadly,"Sure. Where are you headed today?"

Moira shrugs and she almost looks exhausted,"Well every year I usually visit my mother, but she passed on last Halloween, so I've agreed to go out with Chad and Patrick."

Violet looks at her and laughs sarcastically,"I thought they weren't speaking after what happened?"

"Well, they have they're differences, but I presume that they are all they have so they have decided just to accept it. I also told them that I was done with the incessant bickering."

"I'm sorry about your mother," I reply and she simply nods. I always imagined what life would be like if my mother wasn't here with me, if she wasn't apart of my life. It was a thought I tried to avoid, but it always caught up to me.

"Can we go now?" Violet asks, shoving me so that I miss my mouth and the oatmeal collides with my face.

"Jesus," I say as I wipe my it off and lay down my spoon,"Fine then. Let's go."

I jump off the chair and grab my bag and car keys as Violet gives the others hugs good-bye. I follow suit.

"Be careful you two, please," my mom says as she squeezes me to death,"Call me if you need anything."

"Alright mom. Can you let me go now? Besides, Violet can't even die. No offense," I add looking at her face.

"Oh, sorry," my mom says, blushing as she lets me go,"And that doesn't ease my worry."

"See you guys later. Much later," I add to Violet quietly, who laughs and we make our way outside into the sunlight and into my car.

* * *

><p>The hours were going by extremely slow and I was actually happy about it. I felt like I was making up for all the time I had lost with Violet. We usually didn't do much girl stuff, but decided to go shopping and then eat lunch. I payed for everything, which wasn't that big of a deal; it made me feel less guilty about my pursuit of Tate.<p>

"Azura? Yoohoo! Did you hear what I said?"

I look up to see Violet looking at me frustrated,"Sorry. Repeat it?"

She huffs loudly,"I said are we still going to that costume party later?"

I look at her and can't help but burst out laughing. It felt as if she was still alive and we were talking like everything was normal, when it was far from it,"You hate parties. We both do."

She tucks her hair behind her ear and pushes her food away,"Well its not like its a regular party and I never do get out. It would be fun to meet a random person and totally fuck with their mind."

I look at her sharply,"That's not very nice."

"You hate being nice," she laughs back at me.

"Touche," I answer as I put the last fry in my mouth, only to cough on it when I see Oliver walk in the restaurant.

"What is it?" Violet asks and beings to look over to where my eyes are targeted.

"Shit! Don't look over Vi!"

"Who is he?" Violet asks turning back to me,"Is it that guy from school that asked you out?"

I feel my face flush as I attempt to hide but its too late and he see's me.

"Azura?"

I look up, as my face feels like its melting and I wonder how stupid I look,"Oh. Heeey Oliver."

He looks at me puzzled,"Everything okay?"

I try to regain my composure,"Everything's fine. I'm just here with my friend. Oliver this is Violet, Violet this is Oliver."

He looks at her and I can tell he finds her attractive which almost makes me happy,"Nice to meet you."

"You too," Violet says almost politely.

There's an awkward silence until Oliver breaks it,"Well I'll see you."

I return the wave he sends me and watch him walk out.

"I take it back,"Violet says firmly,"You are an idiot. He's perfect for you."

I retrieve my money from my bag and throw it on the table, before getting up,"I think being dead has made you delusional."

* * *

><p><em>Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary,<em>

_Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore,_

_While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,_

_As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door._

_`'Tis some visitor,' I muttered, `tapping at my chamber door -_

_Only this, and nothing more.'_

_-Edgar Allen Poe, the raven_

* * *

><p>I was never one for going out and looking like the skank of the earth, so I had transformed my costume to not look so much like that. Violet and me decided to dress up like we were in Joan Jett and the Blackhearts, my eyeliner a little more heavy than necessary. It was funny looking at the two of us laughing and blasting rock music in my room, just like old times. There was pain in my heart for the whole time we were together that day. I wish I could resurrect her, but once again I was trying to achieve what others saw as impossible.<p>

"Ok I think we are done. Any more glitter and I'll look like I'm going to that gay pride festival my aunt took me to last year," I chuckled at Violet who surveyed herself in the mirror and laughed like she was 5 again.

"I can't remember when you smiled this much,"I say and she looks up at me with a face I can't ever remember her making.

"I just want to be happy today. For once."

I look away, not knowing how to respond and I feel her grab hold of my arm,"Lets get the fuck out of here."

She drags me downstairs and we put our shoes on, but high heels were not my cup of tea.

"You guys look ridiculous," Chad's voice says and I meet his gaze and snort.

"So do you."

He raises his eyebrow at me,"I'm not dressed up miss priss."

I throw him a cheeky smile,"Exactly."

He rolls his eyes and waves my response away,"Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"It'll be hard narrowing the things you wouldn't do, down,"Violet replies as Patrick and Moira join him and I throw my coat on.

"Do be careful," Moira says and I can hear the slight worry in her voice and I think of mom.

"We will. See ya later."

"You think with being sluts all year round you would pick a different costume tonight," Patrick yells after us and smirks and I give him the finger before slamming the door shut behind Violet and I.

* * *

><p>The music was so loud I could barely hear my brain function through it all. The warehouse was enormous and I made sure Violet was close to me as we made our way through the crowd of disguised figures. Neon lights were blinding me as I finally made my way up to the bar, hoping to get a drink of water because I could feel my mouth drying out from being so out of place. It was dimly lit and I looked around me to try to find my bearings only to feel Violet nudge me.<p>

"Are you okay!" she shouts loudly.

I look at her,"Yea! I'm fine, just thirsty."

I know she isn't convinced and she pulls me over to a place where I can actually make out what she is saying.

"We don't have to stay. It is pretty lame here."

I brush her off,"Stop it. We're staying. I want you to have some kind of fun."

Before she can retort two guys make there way over to us and I feel some sort of defensive mode take over. I had learned well by now, to never trust people on Halloween. Especially, the living.

"Hey ladies," I see a tall guy with brown hair and grayish eyes say. He wasn't ugly, but he definitly didn't appeal to me. Same went for the other one who was blonde and had red eyes and I figured they were contacts. Pretty dumb. I had always thought red ones were.

"Would you like to dance?" The blonde one extends his hand to Violet and I look at her with a dont-even-think-about-it look.

"Relax, I'm not,"she whispers so that only I can hear her before answering the man,"No thanks."

"Aww come on," he begs,"I promise just a quick one and then you can never speak to me again."

Violet throws me a whatever look and takes his hand and I feel myself ready to lunge after her, only to be blocked by the other man with grayish eyes.

"She'll be _fine_. I'm Alec."

"Cool,"I reply, clearly hoping he would get the hint that I had no interest in anything he had to offer.

"You have a name?"

"No."

"Interesting. I've never heard that one before."

I roll my eyes and try to get away from him,"That's obviously not my name dumbsass."

I can see Violet in the middle of the crowd and I try to call her name,"VIOLET! VIOLET!"

"Come with me," Alec says and before I know it I'm being lifted off the ground and pounding my fists against him, screaming. But no one can hear me throughout the hellish music or see me being hauled away like an animal through the glowing lights.

"LET-ME-GO! YOU FUCKING BASTARD. GET THE HELL OFF OF ME!"

I feel myself collide hard with the stone floor and stand up quickly. My knees were going to bruise for sure. I look around to see nothing but an empty room and I feel myself start to panic. There was no way out and no one that would hear me scream. And what about Violet? Was she in any danger since she was already dead? Even if she was it still didn't ease my worry for her safety. I kept myself at a distance from the man in front of me, a malicious and lustful look in his eyes.

"If you don't get out of my way I swear to God, I will cut your fucking balls off."

And he laughed then, like some sort of sick lunatic and it made my spine freeze.

"You are a gem. I knew it when I first saw you. You were the one for me. Your little friend is more of Alton's favorite."

I stared at him in disbelief,"If you touch her-"

But before I could finish his hand was over my mouth and I could feel my body make contact with the wall.

"We're gonna play a game. Okay? It's called shut your fucking mouth, or you die." And I saw a hint of silver approach my face and knew that I was fucked.

He inhaled me deeply and closed his eyes as if he was on some kind of drug, and when he opened them I looked away and felt the the knife inches from my cheek.

"God," Was all he said in a seductive tone as I felt his hand dive into my jeans and into my panties.

"STOP IT! PLEASE!" I screamed so loudly I thought my lungs would incinerate they hurt so much. I shut my eyes, imagining I was somewhere else. I was going to die. I knew it. I was never going to see my mom or Violet or anyone else I loved. I was never going to keep my promises I made or become a novelist and change the world or any of the other idiotic things I thought I would do. And I felt it then. White hot tears began to pour from my eyes as a million memories played through my mind of my life and all the things I would never have as the man stuck his fingers in me. So this is how it ends then, as I felt the knife begin to jab into my side. This is how I'm going to die. And then his face came into my mind. _I was never going to see Tate again._

Then it happened. I felt myself being thrown aside, my head hitting the floor, the stars forming before my eyes. I heard yells and cries of pain. Someone else had come, not to take part but to perhaps stop what was taking place? I tried to lift my head up and open my eyes to see what was happening, but the force of the fall was too damaging. I could only hear and what I was hearing scared me, but also told me I was going to be ok. I laid there, not moving until I finally heard the fighting stop and strained my ears to hear clearly, only to feel myself go numb because I knew it then.

"If you touch her again, I will fucking kill you. You can be sure of that."

"Tate.." I whispered softly.

And then the world went black.

_I want to be a good person._


	8. Halloween Pt2

_A/N: This chapter is for Shilo, because she wanted this to happen badly. and to you guys, for reading my crap =]_

* * *

><p><em>B<em>_ECAUSE__ I could not stop for Death,_

_He kindly stopped for me;_

_The carriage held but just ourselves_

_And Immortality._

_-Emily Dickinson_

* * *

><p>I could hear my name through the darkness and someone shaking me violently. Where was I? I could hear the panic in his voice as I felt my mind drift in and out, a faint light dangling in front of my eyes. I feel extreme pain and fear as I hear my name become louder.<p>

"AZURA! Can you hear me? Wake up!"

I feel my eyes snap open from the force of the last shake to see nothing but a blurry figure kneeling by my side. I remembered then what had happened as I tried to regain my sight, Tate finally coming into full focus. The side of my head throbbing with immense pressure. My mouth was extremely dry as I sat up slowly, Tate watching me uncertainly.

"Are you alright?" He asked and I held my head, the aching clouding my functions.

"Yes," I whisper, my voice cracking,"Yes, I'm fine. Where are we?"

I asked this because I noticed I was no longer in the room where I had been assaulted and I wondered how Tate had been able to move me somewhere safe. He stood up and paced around slowly, his steps almost silent.

"I found a room here that was pretty hidden. I needed to get you out of there before that guy woke up. No doubt they are looking for us. Where's Violet?"

He sounded scared as he spoke and I felt myself begin to breakdown.

"I-I d-don't know! We got separated when that guy grabbed me! Tate, we need to find her!"

I had no idea why I was crying so much, it was so unlike me, but the fear of the current situation was getting the better of me. Tate stopped pacing and dropped down on the floor so that he was at level with me, his eyes piercing my tear striken ones.

"Listen to me, everything is going to be okay. I'm not going to let anything happen to Violet-Or you," he tried to sound like everything was indeed okay, but the shakiness of his voice was clear,"I promise."

I simply nodded and he looked at me intently for another second before continuing his pacing.

"Can you stand up?" He asked suddenly and amazingly I felt my body comply, although the throbbing still continued. He grabbed my hand then and dragged me over to the door, opening it slightly to see if anyone was outside it.

"Alright. Stay close to me okay?"

"Okay."

I tried to stop my breathing from being so heavy, but forcing it only made it worse. I followed Tate down the dark and dingy corridor, the lights flickering as if we were in some kind of slasher film. We might as well be at this point.

"What is it?" I ask as Tate stopped suddenly, pushing me against the wall quickly. He put his finger up to his lips, indicating for me to be silent and I nodded as angry voices came into earshot.

"I'm gonna kill that bitch when I find her. Where's the other one?"

I recognized the man Alec's voice and I felt my body tense waiting for the other one's reply.

"She got away, nearly killed me. She did something fucking freaky man!" His voice was quivering with fear and I heard a loud smack.

"You fucking moron! Find her! Go get Mason too, Your fucking useless!" His voice was harsh and I didn't hear a respond from the other guy, only the sound of separate footsteps running.

Tate squeezed my hand tighter and I felt a sort of electricity spark through me that I didn't understand. I just knew I didn't want him to let go. And he didn't as we made our way back down into the sea of people, my eyes trying to locate Violet.

"I don't think she is here," Tate yelled to me loudly. I could make his face out through the neon lights and it was plastered with uncertainty.

"Let's just get out of here. I don't see her," I yelled back and it was true. The crowd had lessened since I had been absent and I didn't see her distinctness among them.

"Where's your cell phone," Tate shouted and I felt so stupid for not thinking about it in the first place, but when I reached into my pocket it was gone. I looked up at Tate wide eyed.

"Fuck! It's not here!"

And then I remembered.

"Shit…I left it in my other jacket when I changed. I swear I thought I had it."

Tate didn't respond, only looked at me as if he didn't know what to say next.

"I'm sure she's fine then. We need to get out of here for now and then we'll figure it out."

He took my hand again and led me toward the entrance, moving rather fast. I used my free hand to thankfully find that my keys were still in my pocket. But before I could tell Tate, I felt myself fall to the ground and looked up to see Tate being thrown to the ground as well by Alec.

"I'm gonna fucking slit your throat," he spat at Tate who tried to get up quickly, only to be kicked in the stomach. I felt myself being hoisted up, my arms twisted behind my back and I cried out in pain.

"Don't touch her!" Tate said quite fiercely and I tried to get free, even though I knew it was a feeble attempt.

"Oh don't worry, I'm going to make sure she's well taken care of. In the meantime, you and me have some unfinished business," he said as he pointed to his eye and I just noticed how swollen it was, a long cut running across his face. I watched as he kicked Tate again, a sense of longing taking over me. Tate couldn't die and yet I still felt the need to save him even with my life being at stake.

"STOP IT! LET HIM GO!"

Alec laughed as he looked down at Tate and then walked over to me, grabbing my face and squeezing it.

"So let me guess, this is your girlfriend is it? How romantic. I always enjoyed killing couples."

"I"LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" Tate shouted as he got to his feet, his eyes turning suddenly..different.

And Alec laughed again as he let go of my face. I could still feel his fingers. I could still feel everything.

"Your lucky your little friend got away, I can't say the same for you. So, who wants to go first? How about this one?," and the man holding me released me as Alec grabbed me, the silver knife against my throat.

"I think I want you to watch her bleed."

Tate didn't move as if he was contemplating his actions before acting on them. But he looked different than it usually did, his face contorted with malice. I closed my eyes, my mind once again began to race with memories, wondering how the fuck we were going to get out of this one. If I died here, I wouldn't be stuck in the house like the others. I didn't know if I would be able to move around freely. I didn't know what death was like for a medium. I had never wanted to spend eternity trapped in a house, but if it meant being around people I loved, then I considered it. I could feel the blade pressing into my flesh, teasing me as I felt myself become even more alarmed. My eyes found Tate's again and I could feel him staring into my very soul, as if telling me it was going to be okay and I understood then.

I wasn't afraid anymore.

"Do it then," I snarled softly and I felt the blade lower slightly as he pulled my head back, his mouth pressed against my skin as he spoke.

"What was that?"

I swallowed. It was going to be okay.

"I said do it, cunt. Be a big man."

He pulled my hair but I didn't cry out,"Shut your mouth, bitch. You have no idea what I could do to you or who your dealing with."

Then I was laughing quietly. Was I going mad? I felt his grip on me loosen.

"I think," I said playfully,"That its the other way around."

And then it happened in an instant. I felt myself being let go and ran as fast as I could into the darkness, the yells behind me growing fainter. I had no idea what had just happened, how I had communicated that way with Tate, how I had no longer felt afraid. I found my car, my hands shaking as I unlocked the doors and hurried inside, making sure the doors were locked once I got in and I waited. And waited. My body felt suddenly apathetic and I tried to comfort myself. Tate still had't found me until after I had woken up from a sleep I didn't even remember falling in to. His face was bloody and dirty, but any wound she had received had already healed themselves. He didn't speak, just looked at me as if examining me with ghost senses. It felt quite uncomfortable for some reason I couldn't explain.

"Tate?" I asked cautiously.

"I'm okay," he replied, his breathing shallow.

The blood on his face scared me,"Tate-did you-please tell me you didn't…"

His eyes became watery and he looked away. I did not want to think Tate was capable of it.

"Tate..please answer me."

He looked back at me with such hopeless longing,"I didn't kill them. I swear. The police will find them broken though."

The weight in my chest subsided and I looked at the clock on the dashboard. It was almost 5 a.m. and I freaked out a little. My mom didn't care how late I was out, but if Violet had gone off to get help, and I had a feeling help would have had arrived earlier on, then nothing good was going to be waiting for me when I got back.

"We should probably get back," Tate broke the silence.

"I'm sorry that your only night out turned to shit, but I'd be dead if it wasn't for you. Why did you save me?"

He looked at me seriously,"Don't ask questions you already know the answer to. You think I want your death on my conscience too?"

I felt sudden anger,"So you saved me out of guilt then? Not because you wanted to? Fuck, and here I thought you cared. I can't believe I actually-nevermind. Just forget it."

"You what?" he asked, a hint of eager in his voice.

"Do you still love Violet?" I blurted out. As soon as I said it I wanted to take it back because his face was expressionless. I felt stupid. Why should I even care about Tate's feelings for Violet? She was my best friend and he was off limits. Wasn't he?

"I'm unsure about things now," he began and I watched him,"I vowed to wait forever for her. She was the only girl I ever knew really and the only one I loved. But, then you came and I-I don't know. It felt like it did when I first met Violet and I hated you at first for it. I wanted you to leave. I felt like you were another girl here sent to destroy me. But I felt drawn to you and I didn't know if that was okay. I didn't think I would ever feel the same feelings for another person. I didn't know if it was possible. Nora told me that you don't know if a persons right for you, until you see what else is out there. And then I saw you, but I wasn't seeing because I love Violet and I always will, but there's something in you I can't let go of. I'll never let anything happen to you. I know this is stupid, but I said it."

I didn't know how to acknowledge him. I didn't know how to respond to anything at this point. I could see why people avoided the house. I could see why I was so infatuated with Tate. It wasn't an act. It wasn't his way of receiving sympathy. Tate had a soul and a heart and a paining need to break free and know that he mattered too. Just like me. I didn't care if it was wrong to feel something for him. I didn't care that it could affect my friendship with Violet. I knew I could prove Tate wasn't a monster.

"I know," was all I said and before I knew it, his lips were on mine.

The kissing was forceful and passionate and I felt myself kissing him back with such intensity, his hands roaming my body. I pulled him into me closer, feeling the softness of his hair through my fingers. Every voice telling me it was wrong no longer existed as I felt the heat of his mouth on mine, the weight of him on top of me.

"Azura," he breathed as he stopped kissing me and leaned up,"Not yet."

I recovered myself and turned away from him, staring at the clock once more on the dashboard.

"I don't know who I am anymore," I said stilly and felt Tate's hand take hold of mine. I looked from our hands to his face, feeling the tears stroll down my face. I felt weak in front of him, but he pulled me into a hug that felt as if we had always been like this.

"I never did. But I'm starting too."

_The thing is, when you fall in love, it's kind of like you go crazy and before you know it, the whole world is different and then you'd do anything for the other person._


	9. Suffering

**A/N: Okay so, by now you know this is going to be a long story. Wanna go for a ride? Strap in please. It's going to get rather bumpy. I'm sorry if this chapter is shitty. I'm in the process of moving and my head is scattered. Please R&R!**

* * *

><p><em>Take <em>

_Just one last dare_

_Pretend you don't care_

_Till twilight falls_

_Wait_

_There's someone else here_

_And I can't stop my tears_

_I've never been so scared_

_-the birthday massacre, lover's end_

* * *

><p>Grounded didn't even begin to cover what I was when mom got ahold of me the next morning. I was actually shocked when she told me I was, seeing as I never had been. In the end I couldn't blame her. When your stuck in a house filled with ghosts, worrying comes natural. Violet and everyone had been there waiting for me when I got back, Tate vanishing before anyone could see us together. She had told my mom everything that had happened and how she had just gotten out of there and back in time to have my mom call the cops, but there was still no sign of me, only the bastards that Tate had promised they would find broken. This made me breathe so much easier because Tate had not lied to me after all. Mom and Ben had went looking for me and I found it strange that no one had found me. Was my car really so hidden from the rest of the world? I had found it odd, but decided to ignore it, because the worried and furious voices were giving me a headache. In the end, I accepted my punishment and made my way upstairs with Violet, my offer to help Moira for the day, discarded.<p>

"You could have died," Violet said to me as I fell face first on my bed, a sudden frustration taking over me,"How did you even get away?"

I had not told anyone about Tate saving me. It was the last thing I had intended to confess mostly because I didn't want anyone to know. I looked up at Violet, feeling anger rise up in me.

"Well if you hadn't run off with that fucker, then maybe I wouldn't have been in that situation. I told you not to go. You didn't listen. And as for getting away, it doesn't matter. You should have been there."

I could tell she didn't know how to respond as I lifted myself up and sat crossed-legged on the bed, looking away from her. I was so mad and confused about everything. Not long ago I had been assaulted and felt utter exhilaration from kissing Tate. I knew I really shouldn't have been mad at Violet, considering she would murder me if she found out Tate kissed me, but I really didn't care. She should have been smarter about leaving me alone.

"In case you didn't know," she started, the annoyance in her voice becoming clear,"I had to fight to get away too and ran to get help. You think I didn't try to save you?"

I looked at her,"In case you didn't notice, you are dead. I never said I didn't think you tried to save me."

"But you implied it," she spat.

I rolled my eyes,"Whatever. Well, I'm alive right? So everything's fine and I can enjoy two weeks of isolation."

Violet looks at me sadly,"Don't be stupid. That's not fair to me."

I knew I was being beyond a bitch, but for some reason, I couldn't help it. I was mad at Violet, I was mad at the world and everyone who had wronged me in my life, but mostly; I was mad at myself and my paining desire for a boy who was not only dead, but had once belonged to my best friend.

"Your my best friend," Violet says softly and I can't bare to look at her because I feel my eyes stinging with tears. What was happening to me?

"And your mine," I whisper back, only to see that she disappeared when I turned around to face her again.

I hoped she had heard me.

* * *

><p>I walked quietly down to the basement, hoping that no one would hear me mostly because it was 2 a.m. The house was eerily quiet and I could hear my footsteps echo as I made my way down the stairs which creaked quite loudly.<p>

"Where the fuck is that light switch," I mumbled to myself as I tried to feel around in the dark, my hand brushing against something.

I pulled back quickly, standing as still as possible. Whatever I touched had felt…inhuman. I tried to see through the darkness a faint light from outside glimmering through the basement window up ahead. Tate had told me that there were things down here that would not welcome me and I knew I should go back upstairs. But the other voice inside my head wanted to talk to Tate so badly, it hurt. So I moved forward, only to feel something grab my leg and pull it out from under me. I felt my back collide with the hard floor, the force of it bruising me even further than I already was. I sat up as quickly as I could, my head snapping in different directions as I heard something shuffling around. I shut my eyes tight. Don't move. Don't move. Don't move. And then it happened. I felt myself being dragged across the floor, my nails scrapping the hard stone floor beneath me. I screamed and it took me by surprise because I was never one to scream so fearfully until I moved to L.A. Until I moved into this house.

"Let go!" I cried out, but the thing did not loosen its grip. I kicked and thrashed, having had enough of this crap to last me a lifetime and then I felt someone grab hold of my arms, but I knew they weren't Tate's.

"Thaddeus! Go Away!" A woman yelled as I fell into her arms. The basement light flickering to life faintly. I peered through her arms to see a creature that was clearly not from this world, let alone, human. Its fanged teeth were barred at me and its arms outstretched, as if all it wanted was for me to hug it. I was surprised then and then I remembered what Tate had told me about Nora's baby and I realized that this thing was it and it shocked me; to almost death.

"Go away!" she cried again and I finally saw that it was indeed Nora holding me. She finally loosened her grip and I turned to see that Thaddeus had vanished.

"Thank you," I said breathlessly to Nora as we both stood up. I felt an immense amount of pain from her than when I had first met her.

She smiled faintly,"If that ever happens again, just say go away and he will."

She turns away from me and I don't know what to say to her to make it better. Nothing would. Unless I fulfilled my promise.

"Nora, I'm really sorry about Thaddeus," Is all I could manage.

"Me too."

I watch her leave, a rush of cold gracing my skin. I held my arms tightly as I stood there for a few seconds, going over the interworkings of my mind before I turned around and found myself in Tate's arms.

"Did I scare you?" he smiles, looking down at me.

I can't help but stare into his eyes, the bright blue penetrating my green ones.

"Where did you come from?" I questioned.

"Why are you down here?" he challenged.

I frowned,"I was looking for you."

"So was I. You weren't in your room."

I stepped away from him and sat down on the bottom step of the stairs, rubbing my leg where Thaddeus had grabbed me. It was beginning to welt. Tate kneeled down so that he was at level with me.

"I told you to stay way from here."

"Yea, I got it." I snapped at him and he laughed. Breathtaking.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

"I'm fine."

"No you aren't."

I looked dead at him,"Does it matter?"

He doesn't answer me, but removes himself from the floor and sits next to me,"I do care about your feelings. I'm really sorry about kissing you like that. I just, I don't know what's happening to me."

He eyes me, a hint of understanding inside of them. His mouth plays into a child-like smile and I can't help but feel myself melt from his perfectly placed dimples. This was wrong a voice in my head screamed. Wrong, but so right.

"I feel sorry for Nora," I said,"Losing a child is hard."

"Losing anyone is hard," Tate replied, leaning back on the stairs.

"Yea."

The silence seemed to last a lifetime before Tate spoke and I was almost glad he broke it.

"I know they told you. About what I did."

I looked at him instantly, my heart thumping faster. I had not wanted Tate to know that I knew in fear that it would ruin my relationship with him. I didn't want him to think that I thought less of him or would push him away like everyone else had.

"Tate, I told you. It wasn't you. You aren't this person. I mean, this Tate in front of me, that's who you are."

His eyes pull away from mine,"I wanted to give her everything. I ruined it all. I guess when you came, I realized I got a second chance. But, I want them to know who I am. I'm not this person."

His voice is full of desperation and I grab his hand,"I know. I know. We are going to fix this. Everything. I promise. I'm not going to let anything else happen in this house. I know what its like to feel this way. To feel immense guilt and suffering."

His eyes snap back onto mine,"Guilty? You can't have possibly done anything as bad as me."

I shake my head as I feel a lump form in my throat, hot tears welling up in my eyes,"Its my fault Marius is dead."

I can't look at him as I speak and I feel his hand squeeze mine,"Tell me."

I swallow hard and look back to him, pure concern written on his face.

"My mom was having her bachelorette party so Marius decided to take me out for the whole day. He said I could do whatever I wanted,"I smiled at the memory of it but could still feel myself crying,"It was one of the best days of my life. I guess when your still young everything feels that way. He took me to the movies and then the museum and then dinner and even dessert after. The museum was my favorite. Marius loved museums too. I had always been fascinated with history and art and I could share that with him. I was immature, but mature for 13. I remember it was really could out that night after we left the ice cream shop. He had made sure my scarf was on before we left. I had insisted we take the long way home so we could stay out a little longer. He said no at first but finally gave in. I remember he was telling me how he and mom were thinking about having a baby. I always wanted a little brother. We weren't far from the house. I remember because the park was across the street from us and that meant we lived two blocks further down. Mom took me there all the time. It happened so fast. Some guy in a jacket came out of no where. I never saw his face. Marius tried to get the guy to just take his wallet and leave us alone but he didn't. I knew he had a gun. And then Marius and the man were fighting. I heard Marius telling me to run, and I did as fast as I could, knowing I needed to find help. I heard the gunshots in the distance and I knew it then. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. But I knew I had to find help. Even after I did it was too late. When the police brought me back over there I saw Marius just lying there in a pool of endless blood. I ran to him, not letting go, the blood staining my jacket. The police had to pry me off of him. I kicked and I screamed but I knew that there was nothing I could do. I never washed that jacket."

I had lost myself during my story and had forgotten Tate had been listening to me. I was unaware that I had been sobbing uncontrollably, my mascara staining my cheeks. In all the time since Marius died, I had never opened up to anyone else about this except Violet. But with Tate, it was different. It was safe. He held me then as I cried and cried. My mind spinning out of control. Maybe it was meant to happen this way. Maybe I was meant to suffer in order to heal. I knew though, that I could never feel guilt like this again and I had every intention of doing what I had said I would. Even if it bled me dry. I was going to set them free. But part of me hoped that somehow Tate and Violet, Vivien, Moira and Ben, would stay with me forever. I was starting to imagine a life without Tate and it felt like no life at all.

_I'll wait. Forever if I have to._


	10. The Darkness

_"Say what you need to save your soul,  
>but leave your religion at the door"<em>

_-Otep, Sacrilege_

* * *

><p><em>"Constance I beg you to see reason! This child cannot live any longer! It is the devil's spawn!"<em>

_I watch as Constance extinguishes her cigarette, her face sour. The woman next to her was slightly abashed, her neck length light brown hair and pale face, a mess. She took a long drag of her cigarette as Constance folded her hands tightly and leaned on them as if thinking deeply._

_"You cannot continue to keep this child. After everything I told you, how could you be so stupid?" the woman said in a rage, looking almost demented. _

_Constance removed her hands from their tight clasp and looked at the woman savagely, another cigarette already lit in her hand._

_"No one and I mean no one-is taking Michael away from me. I'll be damned and buried before that happens, missy. I've lost too much already."_

_She pointed a sharp finger at the woman near to her, who once again took a long drag and exhaled the smoke slowly, looking around her back as if she expected to be attacked. She turned back to Constance and she smirked slightly._

_"What are you smiling about?" Constance questioned in her Southern drawl, her lips pursed and her face almost evil looking._

_"What did you expect would become of this? Did you think you could ignore the fact that he's the Anti-Christ? Remember me telling you? It is the essence of evil, it will damn us all."_

_"He's a good boy," Constance responded, slight tears becoming visible._

_"He's murder two nanny's already!" The woman screeched and Constance winced slightly._

_She placed her cigarette in the ashtray, wisps of smoke spiraling in the light. Her voice cracked with a sort of sadness as she spoke._

_"I can change him," her voice almost delusional and happy,"He just needs my care and affection. He's my grandson."_

_"That's what you thought about Tate! He's our end. Please Constance, get rid of him. I know people who can help. This is fire you are playing with. Hell fire."_

_Constance wiped her tears away._

_"I love my children," she said softly,"Michael is my gift. I can start over. Tate, made a mistake, but made me a mother again."_

_The woman shook her head, tears strangled in her dark eyes._

_"We both know Tate never had a choice. I told you this already. But, it has destroyed us. If you won't listen to me, then so be it. You will never be a mother to this child. You are simply a pawn in his game."_

_She threw her cigarette down and stood up, Constance starring at her blankly as she patted her hair. The woman gathered her purse and turned for the doorway before speaking again._

_"By the way, if I were you, I wouldn't get to comfortable with having Michael as your own. Someone is going to stop him soon, even though she isn't aware yet."_

_Constance starred at the woman's back, lost for words._

_"Silence suits you, Constance," she looked over at her slightly," Everything is going to change. She will make sure of it."_

_And with that Constance watched her exit, the cigarette in the ashtray, nothing more than hateful ashes._

* * *

><p>"Azura! Wake up!"<p>

I woke up abruptly to the sound of Chloe's voice, the library coming back into focus. I felt myself quickly revert back to the dream I had just had. What had just happened?

"Azura?"

I look up at Chloe, Stephanie eyeing me impatiently.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I didn't sleep good last night," trying not to sound to concerned, even though I was. Who was that woman and what had they been talking about? I had another vision, but this one gave off a strange sense, as if it revolved around me. And who was the boy called Michael? I racked my brain trying to remember everything that was said. Tate's name had come up. Tate. The name slipped and out of my mind like a serpent. Michael.

_Tate made me a mother again._

And it hit me full on. Holy shit.

"Azura!" Chloe called out to me again,"I was asking you if you've made any progress yet?"

I brushed my hair away from my face and looked ahead of them. Kyle, Kevin and Amir playing cards. When my eyes looked back at the two girls in front of me, I sighed heavily.

"What's up with you?" Stephanie inquired, rudely.

Chloe starred at me intently,"Yea, you've been off this last week. Its really starting to feel like we don't matter anymore."

I felt hurt by this, but the truth was that I had so much going on in my head. I hadn't spoken to Violet in four days and me and Tate were spending way too much time together. I really feared that the ghosts in the house were going to find out soon. Then again, maybe they already knew. Chad was a nosey little bitch.

"I'm sorry,"I said,"I didn't mean to make you feel so shitty, there's just so much going on. I feel like I'm suffocating."

Chloe looks at Stephanie seriously and then back at me, her brown eyes sympathetic.

"I understand what you're going through. I really do."

I laughed in my head; If only she really knew.

"I'm worried about you," she went on.

I laughed slightly,"I'm okay," A total lie,"Don't worry about it. I made you a promise and I'm going to keep it. Its just going to take some time. Tate doesn't remember anything so I have to try to find the source of what caused it."

Stephanie's eyebrows furrow," That could take fucking forever."

Chloe looks out the library window hopefully and then back at me. The look in her eyes makes me uncomfortable, like she could see right through me.

"You already have an idea, don't you?" she whispers to me and I stare at her taken aback.

Yes, I had an idea. More like the answer. But what would they make of my insane theory? If me talking to them was possible then of course the Devil was a possibility too.

"Yes,"I respond heavily,"I have a theory. But, its crazy. Crazy, but true. I know it."

"Well?" Stephanie asks eagerly, and its the first time I've seen her interested in anything I've said. I suddenly became nervous.

"The Devil," and as it left my lips I knew it was a bad idea to say it.

"That's a fucking joke, right?" Stephanie asks me and I shake my head.

"No. No joke."

Chloe doesn't speak, just stares at me.

"You don't believe in the Devil?" I ask them.

A few seconds pass by before Chloe answers me,"Yes."

I look at her, almost relieved. Stephanie, however, was not amused.

"This is bullshit. You are going to sit here and tell me that Tate murdered us because he was possessed by the Devil?"

The way she said it made it seem more insane than it already was but I stood my ground.

"That's exactly what I'm saying. Hell is real. And so is the Devil. If I recall, you are in hell now."

Stephanie doesn't respond to me, only folds her arms and looks over at Chloe who tries to think of a way to respond. I felt guilty then.

"The Devil makes us sin,"Chloe says softy and almost comprehensive. Me and Stephanie stare at each other,"I always wondered what made humans evil. Who would have thought."

The bell rings overhead and I groan,"Great."

I pick up my bag and notebook and send a wave good-bye to the guys before talking to Chloe and Stephanie again.

"I guess we will have to continue this tomorrow."

Stephanie simply nods and walks away. I stare after her, almost tempted to throw my book at her.

"You real think its true then?" Chloe asks me, her voice almost assured.

I can't help but smile at her then,"Yes. I would never lie to you."

She smiles back,"I know. I guess I'll see you tomorrow then."

"See ya," I wave to her and watch her join the others, my heart heavy once again.

"Talking to yourself?" I hear a voice ask me and I turn around suddenly to see Oliver smirking at me. I looked back only to see that the others had vanished.

"It's rude to sneak up on people," I said annoyed, turning back to him,"Shouldn't you be somewhere else?"

He laughed,"Maybe. Who were you talking to?"

I frown at him and feel myself become slightly mused,"Dead people, obviously."

"Ah, I see. Well then, do they talk to you often?" he smiles.

I chuckle and walk past him, my hand on the door handle,"Everyday during lunch."

It was amusing to know that this was completely true and he thought it was a joke. I wave at him, open the door and disappear. The look on his face is priceless.

* * *

><p>When I got home, I had intended to find mom and tell her everything that had happened in my vision, but part of me thought better of it. What would mom do? What would she say? I felt shaky as I exited my car and made my way up the porch, only to hear someone calling my name. I turned around to see Constance by the gate. I tried to keep my composure as I met her, but I felt my knees go a little weak.<p>

"Constance, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

She still had a cigarette in her hand, but this one was fresh.

"Well, I just thought you would like to come over for a bit? Have some tea? I thought we could have a little talk."

I gaze at her, trying to see through that fake southern smile. There was something off about Constance and something conniving. And I needed to know what. It was the opportunity I needed to prove what I had seen. Mom wasn't home yet but hopefully she wouldn't miss me or care too much.

"Um, yea. That would be great."

She smiled and beckoned me to follow her, and that's when I felt a chill run down my spine. I turned around and looked up at the house, Tate starring at me through the middle window, a look that plainly said please don't go etched onto his face.

* * *

><p>"What kind of tea would you like now?" Constance asked me happily, laying various cookies and bread on the little table in a very old-fashioned kitchen. It felt like something out of the South for sure.<p>

"Um anything is fine," I reply, trying not to sound too out of place.

I watched as she prepared two cups and placed them on the table, her smile becoming more overwhelming to me.

"Now then, tell me everything. How are you? How is school?"

I look at her fixated, not touching the tea in front of me.

"Its ok. I do pretty well."

She retrieves another cigarette from the carton and lights it up. I wondered how black her lungs were.

"That's darling," she waves the smoke away,"I was an excellent student. Daddy always told me that I had to earn everything."

I nod at her, tying to act like I am at least mildly interested, when I spot a bottle on the counter.

"You have a kid?"

She see's where my eyes are locked and then turns back to face me, beaming casually.

"Oh yes. One of my relatives died and I was the only one who could take the baby. It was so sad, so sudden, but I know all about children. I had four of them. I'm a mother you see. I love my children."

I knew very well about all of this already from the others, but apparently Constance didn't think I knew and I wanted to keep it that way as long as I could. She was practically laying the bait out for me.

"Where are they?"

I could tell the question took her off guard, like a smack to the face, and she took a puff of her cigarette before placing it in the ashtray.

"Unfortunetly I lost my children to other things. A sad subject and all in the past now. But, I have Michael and I can finally start over."

I felt my skin become cold and my stomach turned.

"I love kids," I stated and Constance laughed in a high pitch.

"Follow me."

She removed herself from the table and I followed her upstairs into a nursery that was coated in a baby blue that almost made me sick. It was way to sweet for a child that had apparently been dubbed the Anti-Christ. I stopped in the center of the room as Constance walked over to a white crib and removed the little boy from his sanctuary.

Any other time I would have fainted, but this was not the time to do it. I literally felt my whole body immobilize as I set my eyes on the little boy in Constance's arms. Its wispy blonde hair and bright blue eyes were taunting me and his smile was one not normal for a tiny infant. I couldn't look away from him as his eyes searched mine, as if to say, I've been waiting for you. I was looking into a spitting image of Tate and I felt myself want to vomit, the sickness finally succumbing.

"Are you alright dear?" Constance asks, her tone jeering in some way as if she found my apparent shock, amusing.

I finally find the will to break eyes contact with the child and look up at Constance, her face searching mine.

"He's-he's beautiful," I reply and it was true. The Devil would never settle for an unfit child.

"Yes, he is a spitting image of his father," Constance starred at the baby lovingly, her voice breathless.

Did she know I knew? It was beginning to feel like she was fucking with me.

"I real should go now, though. I'm grounded and mom won't be happy if I get home after she does. Thanks for the tea."

I turn on my heel, desperate to leave when I feel Constance lay a hand on my shoulder.

"Do you want to hold him?"

I look from her to the baby in her arms and feel utterly repulsed, a sudden sense of longing to kill the thing coming over me, but I didn't show it.

"Don't worry," I said, backing away from her, my voice sounding almost determined,"I'll come back."

_It's the darkness. It has me_


	11. AN

Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated. Im very sick right now and moving so I will update as soon as I can. Also, I guess people don't read fanfiction as much anymore, so if you want me to update please send me a review.

Lots of love.


	12. 11: Spiraling

_A/N Hey guys. FYI this chapter sucks. I think the sickness is clouding my head. R & R!_

* * *

><p>"<em>Tell the Devil that he can go back from where he came."<em>

_-Brandon Flowers, Crossfire_

* * *

><p>I raced into the house, my blood pumping through my veins as if they were about to explode out of me.<p>

"VIOLET!" I yelled loudly, spinning around in circles,"VIOLET! MOM! VIVIEN! ANYONE!"

Why was I panicking like this?

I ran into the kitchen, hoping to find Moira, but I didn't. Where was everyone? Without thinking I ran downstairs into the basement, making sure I yelled at Thaddeus to stay away before I descended the last step. The dim light clicked to life when I flipped the switch and I felt my breathing become denser.

"Tate?"

But there was no answer.

"Fuck," I swore more loudly than I had anticipated, and found myself face to face with Travis.

"Woah, what's the big emergency?" I could make out his movie-star smile in the faint light.

"Oh Travis," I exhaled,"Its just you. Where is everyone?"

He shrugged slightly, running his fingers through his dark brown hair.

"I never know what's going on here."

I liked Travis, but the dim-wittedness he exampled was kind of sad. I frowned and rubbed my arms, trying to keep warm, the coldness of the basement still taking me by surprise. And then like some sort of muse came over me, I realized it then.

"Travis, you lived with Constance right?"

He tilted his head slightly and sat down on a nearby chair, overlooking me.

"Yea, why?"

I pulled up another chair so that I was facing him completely.

"I need your help. "

He didn't respond, only stood still, fixated on me as if unsure how to proceed with the conversation so I continued on.

"What do you know about that kid living with Constance?"

I saw him become suddenly uneasy,"What about him?"

"Travis, please don't bullshit me. I know you don't want to spend eternity here. Please, if you help me, I can fix everything, but I need you to tell me about that kid. Whatever relationship you had with Constance doesn't matter anymore. That kid is the only thing she cares about."

He raised his eyebrow,"Why are you so concerned about him?"

I starred straight into his dark eyes before responding to him.

"You know why."

He removed himself from the chair and began pacing slowly.

"All I know is probably as much as you know. The baby was suppose to be Nora's but everyone was after the twins. One died and one didn't. Nora got the dead one, well since it died here it isn't really dead, and then Constance got the other one."

He stopped pacing and looked up at me as I stood. I wasn't sure how my face looked at that moment, but I was certain it wasn't one of complete joy.

"But- how did she get it?" I asked confused,"How did no one see her take it?"

Travis fidgeted in place again,"Well she didn't steal it right away."

My eyes remained locked on his,"I don't understand."

"Jesus," A girlish voice said sarcastically from the shadows,"I thought you knew everything."

I watched as a slim girl with long auburn hair appeared in front of me, her vicious green eyes just visible. I didn't like the energy she gave off, instantly telling me that she was not one of the good ones in the house. I felt my mind take her in, images of her death coming into focus. I almost felt bad for her. But apparently murder and betrayal had made her bitter. I glared at her as she starred daggers at me, comprehending that she was manipulative bitch.

"Hey Hayden,"Travis said unenthusiastically and backing away slightly so that he wasn't in between us.

It was like a punch to the stomach as I looked from Travis then back to her. I had wondered why I hadn't met Ben's murderer before now. And there she stood, a sinister smirk plastered on her face which caused my fists to clench.

"So, you're the bitch that's responsible for Ben's death," I spat at her and she laughed.

"I didn't lay a finger on him."

"You might as well have," I retorted, fuming.

She began to circle me while she talked as if she was a cat ready to pounce on its prey at any moment. I watched as Travis remained hidden nearby like some pussy.

"I'm sorry we haven't met sooner. I've just been so busy."

I snorted,"Cut the bullshit. What do you want?"

She stopped circling me and leaned up against the wall, her eyes never leaving mine.

_What is it about being dead that makes me so horny?_

The words flooded into my mind and I shook my head violently.

_Quit it. I'm in love._

I shook my head again, the new words fresh in place of the previous ones.

"Going crazy?" Hayden pressed playfully,"Don't worry; sooner or later it will kill you."

"Shut up slut," I growled in a tone that was unlike my own,"If you know something then tell me. I'm not playing games."

She huffed loudly,"You already know what that child is so what exactly are you trying to figure out? Yes, Constance planned all along to steal the baby, but so did everyone else. I just got it first after I had Ben hanged. Then that bitch came and stole him from me, thanks to you Travis," She spat at him although she clearly missed.

I looked over at him, some sort of guilt plastered on his face.

"Travis? Is this true? You gave Constance the baby ?"

I waited, hoping it wasn't true, only to see him nod. Sweet Travis. Had he simply been blinded by his own needs? Did he really think Constance would be a good mother to this child or would stay with him? It was Travis after all. Maybe he hadn't even known at the time what it was.

"I didn't know," he replied quickly as if reading my mind,"I didn't know what it was until that lady came and we heard her talking to Constance when she was trying to banish Chad and Patrick. I just knew Hayden couldn't have it. Constance wanted to be a mother again. I thought it would be alright."

I froze,"Wait? What lady? You mean no one else in the house knows what that baby is except you two?"

I faced Hayden as she played with a strand of hair seductivly,"Well, and Tate."

I massaged my head, the burden on my shoulders becoming even more heavy. So Violet and the others didn't even know about Michael. They had no idea the danger lurking right next door.

But Tate knew. He knew and he didn't tell me.

Even if I could get close enough to kill this baby, how did I rid of it?

_I have people who can help._

I removed my fingers from my temples and faced forward again. Of course. That lady I had seen in my vision. The lady Travis had heard Constance talking to. She knew everything. A way to kill it. I had to find her. If she was a medium then mom would know. _Someone_ here had to know her personally.

_Violet_

Her name leaked into my head like melted ice.

"You can't kill it. You'll die before you even get near it,"Hayden sneered and I began to walk away, not even acknowledging Travis as my foot hit the bottom step.

"You think you can save us! You really think Tate gives a shit about you? Your nothing!" Hayden yelled loudly after me, the psychotic nature of her voice visible,"You'll end up here just like the rest of us! You hear me bitch!"

I turned to her, no emotion visible on my own face as I met her rage.

"I hear you Hayden. But just so you know, when I do save everyone in this house, your going straight to hell. In that case, you might as well just stay here. You did this to yourself."

And I trodded up the steps quickly, locking the door behind me, leaning on it for a moment to catch my breath. Before I walked away I could of sworn I heard Hayden crying.

* * *

><p>I felt myself slam against the wall, a cold hand over my mouth keeping me from screaming. I looked up only to find my assailant to be Tate. He lowered his hand from my mouth and smiled as if it had been funny.<p>

"What the fuck Tate," I snapped, pushing him slightly,"That wasn't funny. And where the hell have you been?"

"I'm sorry," he purred, inching closer to my neck. I could feel his breath on me and it gave me goosebumps,"I didn't mean to scare you."

He traced his fingers on my bare skin and I felt my judgement become clouded. I wanted so desperately to tell him to stop, but it felt so nice to have him touch me this way.

"Why did you go over there?" he finally asked, pulling away to look at me.

The question, although I knew it was coming, took me off guard. I had been so entranced by the moment; the feel of him. But he had kept something from me. Something dark and it flooded into my mind making me overcome his touch.

"Tate, what do you know about the baby Constance took? Michael?"

I felt him pull away from me and I instantly regretted it. I felt his eyes meet mine and the chill that overtook my body frightened me. I tried to read him, to understand the look he was giving me, but I couldn't place it. He looked scared and almost worried that I knew something. Something he hadn't anticipated, but I just poured my eyes back into his, demanding an answer. I needed the truth. At least, what I didn't know already.

"You shouldn't listen to stories, Azura," he said firmly causing me to stare at him blankly.

"It isn't a story! You knew what it was! You knew what it was and you let Constance get away with it!"

I was once again shocked by the loudness of my voice, I had never thought it would hurt so much to yell at Tate face on. I felt myself beginning to crumble in front of him, the desire to wipe all of this away ungraspable. He just looked at me, nothing but an intense stare that made my bones freeze.

"I tried to save it. I did. But, I couldn't."

I could hear his voice quaver as he spoke and all I wanted to do was kiss him and tell him how much he was destroying me at the same time. I wanted to hit him and hold him close to me and tell him how much I wished I could run away with him. I wanted to tell him how much I wanted everything to be normal and to go back and change the past, even if it meant he would end up with Violet. This was not a life.

"You should have tried harder," I snapped, not looking at him, but I knew it had set him off because the next thing I knew he slammed his fist against the wall pushing me flat against it. My eyes averted back to his and they were cold. The blue swimming in a dark vast sea of endlessness. The tears finally visible.

"I never wanted this. I never wanted this life for anyone. I never wanted it for you."

Seconds of silence went by before I finally found myself push past him, my feet carrying me as far away from him as possible. Of all the things I had expected in my life, I had never thought falling in love with a dead person to be one of them. I had never intended to remain trapped somewhere surrounded by so much suffering. I had wanted so much more for myself, to put my mistakes behind me, but the loses just kept coming. Losing Violet was the next strike in my heart. How much more could I take? Ever since I came here it was as if something took hold of the reins and brought out things in me I had tried so hard to control. I was never this weak. Maybe now I knew why it was so easy for Violet to cut. Maybe I had let Violet down. Maybe she would still be alive if I had been here. What if everything I knew, everything that mattered, was all a lie? I thought about what Hayden had said about Tate not caring about me, sick at myself for even thinking she was right. I felt Tate in my blood. I could taste him in my mouth. He loved me. Didn't he?

I slammed my bedroom door closed and leaned my head on it, trying to remember any part of me that made sense. When I turned around however, I was greeted by Violet, a somber look glazing her face as she spoke. The air became ten degrees colder.

"We need to talk."

_It is the essence of evil_


	13. 12: Got to Get Out

**A/N: Sorry its so sort and shitty. This move is taking a lot out of me. Please review!**

* * *

><p>"<em>White, white as a sheet<em>

_I saw a ghost, I think it was me_

_I've got to get out_

_Out of this town  
><em>

_It's scary  
><em>

_Sometimes when I sleep  
><em>

_I miss my home, I miss my tree  
><em>

_And now it's up to them to carry me back up to the top"_

_Barcelona-falling out of trees_

* * *

><p>"I should have believed you—about Tate," Violet says to me, her expression nothing more than visible pain. I watch her closely, keeping the distance between us.<p>

"What exactly do you mean?" I question her softly.

"The day I killed myself was the day I found out about Tate being dead and what he did to those kids. I thought I was losing my mind. You don't understand the bomb that went off inside me. I found Constance in the kitchen smoking a cigarette, as usual. She knew that I had found out. Don't ask me how, maybe it was that medium. She told me that Tate began losing his way in this house; that the house drove him insane—changed him. At the time it seemed like bullshit, but Constance was right about it in the end, wasn't she? I was blind to the reality of it."

I felt my throat close up, unable to respond. All along she knew deep down that my idea wasn't so insane afterall. Maybe it had been hard for her to accept out of fear. Or maybe she really had been blinded and only saw Tate as a monster because that's all he seemed to be.

"I want to help you—with Tate."

And as it left her lips I couldn't help but stare at her blankly.

"Come again?"

She removed herself from the bed and walked over to me somewhat sluggishly.

"I want to help. If something really is taking control of Tate, and I'm sure there is, then I want to make sure it burns in hell for what its done to him-to all of us."

"I actually think its use to hell so that won't do much good," I tried to smile slightly,"So what does this mean then? You forgive him? Can you even face him?"

The question, however uncomfortable it may have been to put out there, had to be said. I watched as Violet fidgeted before answering me.

"Mom and Dad can't know. I have a feeling it will be harder for them to accept. My dad saw a side of Tate I never saw and its embedded in his memory. I don't think he will be too keen on what we are doing. As for me forgiving Tate…."

She looked straight into my eyes and took a giant breath that made me hold mine.

"It wasn't him? Your certain?"

I let out the breath I had been containing.

"You already know my answer."

She simply nods slowly and replaces herself back on the bed, her eyes focusing out the window. I find a spot next to her and place her hand in mine, the frigidness overwhelming it.

"I have to confess something," I reply as she turns to face me and I can tell she is listening,"Before I came here I was never so confused, so overwhelmed and hurt. I see now why you cut. I had dealt with the dead hundreds of times with mom, but this place out of everything I've ever known is somehow breaking me. I guess you can see why I felt for Tate in the first place. I had sensed him differently than mom had, maybe because I'm younger and feel things differently. But I knew something wasn't right here as time went on. I was starting to realize what was going on within these walls. I couldn't understand why it seemed so impossible to some, and that's when you helped me see; everyone was simply blind. Everyone in this house has given up, accepted their fate. But I know Violet, if I can stop it, then everyone can move on. Maybe even leave the house for good. But I need you because you felt this way too once. You felt like you were going mad and I do feel it Violet. I 'm feeling it more and more everyday. I know you think I'm crazy for saying this, but when I'm around Tate, I feel like I'm normal again sometimes. I never intended to have this kind of relationship with him."

I hadn't realized my eyes had lost hers during my speech and I was scared to look back up at her. She squeezed my hand lovingly however, and I finally met her gaze once more, slight tears visible.

"I don't blame you for falling for him. When I first saw him it was as if I fell from the sky. I had never had that feeling before. It was surreal."

I can't help but feel my heart break a little bit in my chest and felt myself begin to cry.

"I'm so sorry, Violet. I would give anything to go back and change everything. Stop you from leaving or at least tried to come see you. I knew something was wrong and I should have listened to my gut. I have so many regrets, so many things I wish had turned out different. Even sleep is becoming more intolerable than it usually is."

She pulls me into a bone-crunching hug that I can't ever remember her giving me except when we were little and I return the favor. She wasn't just my best friend, she was my sister. I felt her inside of me. I wasn't embarrassed to breakdown in front of her or even felt weak as I had in front of Tate. With Violet, I was able to be myself.

"It wasn't your fault. Nothing was your fault. Me dying, me moving, you falling for Tate—even Marius."

I let go of her slowly, the mention of Marius stinging my ears. My eyes found the window and I craned my neck to see out of it; it was getting dark.

"Marius would never want to watch you waste away like this," Violet's voice swimming into my head,"You have to stop blaming yourself."

I look at her and wipe my eyes, my mascara staining my sleeve.

"I know. Its just hard to want something and know you can never have it back. In away, I'm afraid of letting you guys move on. I know that's selfish of me, but I can't imagine my life without you. Any of you. I'm so terrified. What if we can't stop it?"

"We will. You have no idea what your capable of."

I nod and decide to slap myself out of my self pity. There was still so much to do and so many questions to answer.

"Well, if you are going to help me then you can start right now. We need to find that medium and you're the only one whose met her here."

Violet frowns at me, her expression uncertain.

"Why do we need her? Your mom is a medium."

This was the one thing I was dreading to tell her, but I knew it had to be done. If there was any hope left in the house at all, then it was me and Violet. She was right as she always had been our whole lives. I had to put everything behind me and focus on the shit that was consuming me now. The burden would just become heavier if I let it. I thought about the future; a picture perfect life somehow laying ahead of me and Tate would be there and so would everyone else. But, they would be happy and free and decide to stay with me rather than move on. It was selfish of to want that, but it was the only thing that sent some sort of ray of sunlight in my mind. Even if it was impossible, it was certainly better than never being able to escape this hell. I could still remember our lives before of all of this. How had everything gotten so fucked up? I braced myself for the reaction Violet would give me as I opened my mouth and told her about Michael.

* * *

><p>"<em>I wish we could stay like this forever," I said as me and Tate layed on the roof, the stars gracing the sky like tiny diamonds placed so perfectly in their positions. I felt Tate's fingers intertwined in mine.<em>

"_I can stay like this forever," he said playfully,"You however, can't"_

_I leaned my head slightly to look at him, only to be greeted by his own eyes. He had been watching me. For how long, I didn't know._

"_Once I set everyone free you'll be able to move on. Maybe even leave whenever you want."_

_He frowned,"What makes you think I would move on?"_

_I looked away from him, averting my eyes back up to the midnight blue abyss. There was a long pause until I heard him speak again._

"_Your going to leave after all of this aren't you?"_

_I looked back at him quickly and sat up._

"_What makes you think that?"_

_He shrugged," Everyone leaves this place. Either dead or alive—screaming."_

_I rested my arms on my knees and looked ahead of me._

"_Actually, I had intended to leave, but only because there would be nothing for me here after everyone moved on."_

_Tate finally sat up and stared at me seriously._

"_How could you even think any of them would leave you. They would stay, Azura. I would stay. What the fuck do I need to go to a better place for? I mean, if I even got into a better place. Ever since you got here…things feel right again. I never thought they would again."_

_I close my eyes and exhale loudly._

"_This is all hypothetical of course. I don't even know if I can do it yet. Its destroying me."_

_Tate cups my face in his hands and I feel a sudden sense of safeness from it that I can't ever remember getting from any other guy. Maybe that's because Tate wasn't just another guy._

"_Everything's going to be okay. I promise."_

_"Sometimes it feels like nothing's changed. Not true of course. Everything's changed. If Marius saw me now he probably wouldn't even recognize me."_

_And when he puts his lips to mine the world fades away. _

"_Are you still having trouble sleeping?" he asks as he pulls away from me and I feel myself craving him more," I'll stay with you tonight if you want."_

_I close my eyes and lean my forehead against his, nodding. I had suffered from Parasomnia since I was little and my nightmares were as vivid in my head as they were when I was awake. I always saw the dead. Always felt the pain. I had never been able to sleep properly until Tate came along. As we settled into bed I felt him press against me, whispering into my ear about how he would never let anything happen, how he would always be here. I felt my eyes begin to close from the softness of his voice and saw nothing but white light when I finally succumbed to sleep._

* * *

><p>"<em>I'll always be here. If that's what you want."<em>


	14. 13: Mortality

**A/N: Hey guys soooo the story is taking a big turn and im sorry the chapies have been short and crappy. like i said, lots going on but i want to make you happy. so the story will also get confusing if it hasnt already and there will be some major i cant believe that just happened moments. the story will be over in about 9 chapters. we shall see. read and review please. its my birthday thrusday so it will make me =].**

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><p>"<em>Well this side of mortality is<br>scaring me to death  
>to death"<em>

_-the temper trap, soldier on_

* * *

><p>W. Somerset Maugham once said that death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. Looking back now, I somehow realize its the same advice I would give to those who aren't tuned into this kind of life, but me, I would never stay away from it even after all this shit. I had almost given up hope on the search for Billie Dean, seeing as Constance couldn't know what we were up to, and luckily was able to track her down a few days later. I couldn't keep it from mom though and I had told her exactly what was going on, leaving my relationship with Tate out of it. It turns out that she had run-ins with Billie in the past, her reputation procceding her and agreed to let me meet her if she was present. I didn't argue or protest because I had wanted mom there. I had felt like I had become detached from her since we moved here and I was afraid our relationship was crumbling like Violet's had with her parents. I wasn't going to die in order for it to get fixed.<p>

And there was the other problem that began to consume my thoughts: How would Tate and I stay together? He was dead and I wasn't. I would age everyday and he would stay exactly the same, watching me deteriorate if I even remained around for that long. I had always had plans for my life. Even though I hated school, I was smart and wanted to go to college, although I had always intended for Violet to go with me so we could be miserable together. That hurt most of all. All the things we had wanted to do were never going to happen. I had been skipping school the past week, unbeknowest to mom, mostly because I couldn't find myself focusing on anything else other than staying here with Violet. I felt like such a bitch for ignoring Chloe and the others, but there was nothing I could do for them at the moment. At least, not until this was all said and done and I had made that clear multiple times already.

"When are you going to talk to Tate?" I asked Violet as we played chess in my room the day Billie was set to arrive.

I had always been terrible at chess and wasn't surprised when Violet took my rook.

"Are we really going to bring this up now?" she sighed.

"Better now than later." I replied as she made her next move spectacularly.

"I win," she said somewhat triumphantly, but in a way that implied she knew she was going to the whole time.

"So?" I pressed on and she raised her eyebrows in defeat.

"How about later tonight. Will that satisfy you?"

I frowned,"I guess so. This is going to be very awkward isn't it?"

A smile tugged at her lips,"I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't."

I stared at her intently, wondering what was exactly going on in her head at that moment. A burning question tugging at me.

"Maybe after all this you and Tate can…I don't know…start over?" I blurted out stupidly, causing her to stare at me like I was crazy. Maybe I was.

"What are you talking about?"

I shook my head,"Forget it. I'm just being silly."

She wasn't buying it though, her brown eyes concerned.

"Why would you want that? Don't you want to be with him?"

I can't help but look at the floor, my chess pieces scattered in front of me.

"I'm not dead Vi and it was wrong of me to think that anything like this would work. I know you still love him and eternity dead gets pretty lonely."

"Where is this coming from all of a sudden? Just a few days ago you were all for it. Besides, if you get us out of here we can go wherever we want."

I stare up at her not being able to respond right away. Yes, I had been all for it, but the more I dreamed at night, the more I saw things that terrified me. I had woken up screaming the one night Tate hadn't been there with me. I had seen so much blood, Violet dead in his arms, my body lying in front of him while he screamed for me. Then the images would change. I would see Tate standing there in front of me and hear the Devil whispering in my ear.

"_You'll never replace her. He'll always love her over you. I can make you happier." He jeered._

_I tried to reach out for Tate but he would vanish._

"_You're going to die."_

_And I heard Tate's voice fill my ears, an overwhelming pain in the middle of my stomach. I looked down to see the hilt of a knife protruding from it, the blood spreading slowly and evenly. I felt my hands shake as I reached down to try to pry it out, the blood making my hands slip as Tate materialized in front of me, his face flashing from the form of a skeleton to his angelic features. I felt the blood flow into my mouth, the taste of iron visible as I stared at him helplessly._

"_I'm not gonna hurt you. You have to trust me."_

I didn't remember anything after that and I never went back to sleep that night. I hadn't told Violet that this was the real reason my view had slightly changed. I wasn't good enough for him. I couldn't stay in this house much longer. I was going insane. I was quickly snapped out of my thoughts when there was a knock at the door.

"Azura, Violet. Billie is here," my mom said through the door.

"Alright, we'll be right there!" I called back to her, tearing my eyes away from the door and back to Violet.

"You go on ahead. I have to talk to Tate. Tell them I'm puking or something."

She eyed me strangely before shrugging and exiting the room. I stood there in the middle of the floor, the chess board and its pieces abandoned.

"I never trusted her," Tate says and I turn around to see him sitting on my bed, a deck of cards in his hands,"That Billie woman. Wanna play?"

I walk over to the side of the bed and fold my arms.

"I can't right now. I have to get downstairs."

He looks up at with a playful smile that makes me melt and I try to shake it off, but its become so hard to ignore.

"Violet wants to talk to you later. She finally believes me about you."

I watched as he shuffled the cards, his face becoming blank.

"So what does that mean?" he asks with a hint of anger in his voice and it sidetracks me.

"I thought you would be happy. She's going to forgive you."

I hadn't expected him to stand up so suddenly, the deck of cards being forcefully thrown to the ground. I watched as they scattered all over the floor, Tate's anger evident.

"That's what you wanted all along isn't it?" he yelled loudly in my face and I backed away from him,"Get Violet back in my life because that way you wouldn't feel guilty about leaving and fucking me over!"

"No!" I pleaded. He was scaring me,"Tate no that's not-"

"DON'T LIE TO ME!" he screamed cutting me off, his rage sending me back further away from him,"I knew you were sent here to hurt me! I should have driven you out of here when I had the chance!"

He walked closer to me and pushed me gently against the wall, his face dangerously close to mine.

"You love me don't you? Don't you?," I could hear his voice shaking, tears streaking down his face,"I would have done anything for you. I love you. Tell me you won't leave me. Tell me you'll stay with me forever."

I can't help but stare at him in disbelief. Something wasn't right. This wasn't right.

"Tate—this isn't you. Just calm down and listen to me. I just thought that you'd be happy with Violet again. I do love you. God, I do. But, I'm alive Tate. I'm alive."

I see some sort of fear flicker in his eyes and I can't understand it. He pulls away from me and looks in the other direction, his hands on his head.

"Tate?" I asked cautiously,"Stay here okay? I'll be back and we can talk more and play cards alright?"

I tried to sound reassuring as I inched towards the door, receiving no response from Tate and wrenched it open, closing it softly behind me.

How long I stood against the closed door of my bedroom, I didn't know.

_Everything's gonna be okay_


	15. Chapter 14: Once I Knew

**_A/N:So this chapter is sucky and i may be changing it. the move is going ok. R&R please!_**

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><p><em>at once I knew I was not magnificent<br>Strayed above the highway aisle  
>Jagged vacant, thick without us<br>I could see for miles, miles, miles_

_-Bon Iver, Holocene_

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><p>When I finally walked into the kitchen, everyone was already there, all eyes on me as I sat down next to my mother. I looked directly at the woman who was known as Billie, her face recognizable from my vision. She held a cigarette in one hand, her face stern as she didn't break eye contact with me. Why did everyone around me have the need to smoke? Maybe the nicotine was the only stress reliever around here. The room was uncomfortable as I waited for someone to break the silence.<p>

"So you must be Azura?" Billie asked me in a cool casual tone. I nodded and she put out her cigarette, blowing the last of the smoke out from her lips.

"You're mother tells me that you are also a medium. I could sense it as soon as you walked into the room. "

"Yes," my voice cracked slightly,"Did she mention anything else?"

Billie looked slightly amused as she spoke,"She didn't have to tell me much. I already knew it was going to come down to this."

I raised my eyebrow,"So, can you help us or what?"

"I can see what I can do," she responded, smoothing her skirt,"This isn't an easy task for you and it certaintly isn't a walk through the park. Generations of people have faced the ultimate evil, consumed by the power of it; destroyed. What was created is the one thing that has been feared by Vatican since the dawn of time. The answer lies with them."

I looked over at Violet, her face tilted as if unsure about her answer.

"There must be another way," Vivien spoke up and I shifted my eyes to her,"The Vatican is all the way across the world. How do you expect them to even listen to you?"

Billie had already had her answer ready,"Because, I've put some work forth for them. I guess you can say that there are things about the church that you would never imagine possible. Just ask your mother," she added, looking at me.

My face locked on my mom who stared from Billie and the others, to me.

"You remember when you asked me about demonic possession?"

I nodded slowly.

"Billie and I go way back. We had met when I was in college and when she had confessed to me that she knew I was a medium, we decide to start a sort of business. After we graduated we went to study abroad in Italy where we met a family whose son had apparently been possessed. The thing was, that he was already dead. But he was still in his home, acting like nothing had happened, just like Tate. He didnt know he was dead, but he still showed signs of possession afterwards. They had asked the church for help as well. There was a group of priests that would secretly give exorcisms without the church. We offered our services. They accepted and we helped them banish the demon."

I couldn't help but stare at my mom in awe. Why had she never told me?

"So what happened," Ben asked," To the boy?"

"He was able to move on," Billie replied, her face unemotional.

"So you're saying," Violet began, "That if we do that to Tate, he'll be free?"

Billie pursed her lips and then sighed," I can't be sure. We can only try. Possession is different for every spirit."

"That still doesn't help me with killing the Anti-Christ," I said slightly annoyed,"How do we kill it? Its not being possessed by a demon, it is the demon. I doubt the church can help with that."

Surprisingly Billie laughed,"They can help you. It just so happens that they have been planning for this."

"You can't expect Azura to kill it alone,"Ben said rather loudly,"She's just a kid. She could die."

"I agree with Ben. This isn't some job that you come home from,"Vivien said, concern in her voice,"Lily, you can't be considering this."

Her eyes were nearly begging my mother to agree with her. I sat there utterly confused and awestruck. This was becoming way too complicated for my taste. I was also offended at being referred to as some child.

"_I know you can hear me."_

_I snapped my head up to see Billie eyeing me._

"_What the fuck?" I stated, startled._

"_Don't worry. You're not going insane. Your mom can do it too."_

"_I don't understand. What's going on?" I asked, my tone shaky._

"_It's the only way I can speak to you without the others hearing," she began,"Azura, I know you know the truth of this situation. The church can help, but only slightly. You are the only one who can kill him."_

_I felt my eyes bulging out of my head,"Oh my god. The vision I had. The day you visited Constance. You were talking about me?"_

_She nodded, but only inappreciably._

"_But, I thought you couldn't see the future. Violet told me."_

_A smile tugged at her," I have many friends, Azura. Your arrival was very big news. I knew that you would see it if I had went to see Constance."_

"_So you planted it? I mean, what I saw?"_

"_Yes."_

_I looked down at the floor and then back at her, the others making conversation._

"_I need your help. I don't know what I'm suppose to do. I'm not some savior."_

_She frowned,"You're saving Tate."_

"_That's' different. He isn't some devil baby."_

"_He might as well be," she responded," You need to accept your fate. The sooner you do, the better. You need to, otherwise you won't succeed. There's something I need to give to you, but I have to get it first. Once I do, you will be able to achieve this task."_

_I stare at her blankly," Why me?"_

_She looks at me seriously, her face graced with something as if she could see inside me. It was a look I couldn't ever remember getting from anyone._

"_Because you were meant to."_

* * *

><p>"You're still here." I breathed as I shut my bedroom door behind me and found Tate waiting on my bed.<p>

"Do you not want me to be?" he asked uncertainly.

"No, I do. I just thought you were mad at me," I answered, laying down next to him.

He turned his head around to look at me and I felt my body tense. He uncrossed his legs and crawled over to me so that his face was above mine.

"I'm never mad at you. I'm sorry for what I did. I just—I can't bring myself to think about losing someone else."

_Do you think I'm crazy?_

"Its fine. I'm way too tired anyway. I've been sleeping way too much."

Tate inched closer to my face. He was becoming warmer and warmer to me as if the cold was deteriorating. As if he was alive. Was it because of me?

"What happened downstairs?"

I stifled a yawn,"I promise to tell you everything later. Its all scrambled in my head right now."

He nodded and placed his lips on mine. I felt his body on top of me, the weight overpowering me as his kissing became more intense and I could feel him becoming aroused. I was unprepared for it. I kissed him back, my fingers intertwined in his golden locks and I felt myself becoming wet. Tate's free hand roamed my body, touching me as if I was made of fine china. I regained myself and tried to push him away so I could speak.

"Tate-stop-for-a-second."

He pulled away quickly,"Am I hurting you?"

I sighed heavily,"No, its not that. I just—I want to be with you, but maybe tonight isn't the best."

He looked rather hurt as he lifted himself off of me and slid of the bed. I felt like such a dumbass, but after the conversation I had with Billie, sex was the furthest thing from my mind and it sucked.

"I decided to talk to Violet if it will make you happy," he finally stated after seconds of silence. I removed myself from the bed and hugged him tightly, giving him the assurance I knew he needed. He didn't let me go as I we looked into each other's eyes.

"Thank you," I said.

"It's what you want. I want you to be satisfied."

I frowned,"You don't have to always please me, Tate. You being here is enough. "

He cupped my face and kissed me. It was never enough when he pulled away.

"Do you want me to come back after," he questioned me.

"I'll probably be passed out, but your always welcome too."

I hopped back into bed and he pulled the covers over me, placing a kiss on my forehead. I watched him walk over to my bedroom door and open it slowly.

"I'll see you soon,"I said sleepily.

He turned to face me. I could just make his face out in the faint light as my eyes began to droop and I heard him speak, his soft voice comforting me and taking me away from all the shit in my life. I once again reverted to my fantasy about our lives away from here. Where we could runaway and see the world. Miles and miles of landscape in front of us and nothing holding us back.

"I'll be here in the morning when you wake up."

I finally drifted away.

_We have each other_

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><p><em>I was cold. Way too cold. Something was off and someone was laughing. I was running, my feet bleeding and taking me in different directions. I ended up at a dead end and in nothing but darkness. The laughing grew louder. I felt myself begin to panic. My body was laying in front of me and I screamed.<em>

__"NOOOO!"

I woke up so fast I almost couldn't catch my breath.

"Azura! What's wrong?"

I looked next to me to see Tate startled. It was still dark out. I felt my head and it was warm. I looked around the room, alarmed as Tate still stared at me as if I was about to go crazy. Something wasn't right.

"Azura?" Tate yearned for my response and I stared up at him then, my heart thumping faster and my voice barely a whisper.

"Tate...I think I'm going to die."

He looked fearful as he turned away from me and it scared me further.

"Tate?"

He ignored me.

"TATE!" I yelled and he finally looked at me, his eyes watery as he held my hands in his.

"Azura..." he said quietly and I felt a knot in my throat. Some kind of comprehension dawning on me.

I couldn't breathe as I stared daggers at him.

"Tate..am I dead?"

_I tried to save you_


	16. Chapter 15: Something Better

_**A/N: so im moving upstate in a week. I'm sick again and things are crazy here so i apologize for the lack of writing and talent. I have a lot on my mind. R&R**_

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><p><em>The picture was left on the front porch, the back said<br>I love you, don't you ever think of me?  
>My body goes then to hell with my soul<br>We don't even know the difference  
>The dead folks in the clouds, for crying out loud<br>While they lied at night, they lied at night, while they lied  
>While they lied at night, they lied at night, while they lied<br>And why, did we live so long?_

_-band of horses, cigarettes and wedding bands_

* * *

><p>When I awoke it was morning and I looked over to see Tate fast asleep.<p>

_It had been a dream_

I ruffled my hair and took a sharp intake of breath.

_Had it been a dream?_

I was careful as I stepped out of bed and made my way downstairs, the morning light fading in through the windows faintly. I stood at the foot of the steps for a moment and strained my ears to hear any sign of movement, but none came. The house was eerily silent and I guessed it was still early. My eyes averted to the front door suddenly. If I was dead there was only one way to find out.

I slowly made my way over and wrenched the door open, the sun flooding inside. There was a light breeze that graced my face. I shuffled down the steps and felt my feet halt every now and then. My body was covered in goosebumps and I felt my blood pumping profusely; There was the panic beginning to take over. I found myself face to face with the iron gate and I reached for it, my hands shaking and my breath hitching. I opened it and closed my eyes as I stepped onto the sidewalk, afraid at what was awaiting me. But when my eyes opened I found myself exactly in the same spot on the sidewalk. I exhaled thankfully, clutching my chest. I was nervous and I felt as if something still wasn't completely right. I turned back around and headed back toward the house, looking over to see Constance waving at me. I returned it reluctantly and closed the front door behind me.

"Lily, I don't know about this," an angry whisper filled my ears and I recognized Vivien's voice.

I tiptoed over to the kitchen door and tried to listen.

"And what other solution is there, Viv? If you have any suggestions, please feel free to example them," my mother snapped back.

I had never heard Vivien and my mother speak to each other that way and it bothered me. They had always been like sisters, just like me and Violet.

"There has to be another way," she responded hopefully and I could hear my mother sigh.

"Vivien I understand that you are having a difficult time with this. I understand he is still you're son, but he isn't human."

"It's not just that, "Vivien went on quickly,"Its also Azura. How can we trust Billie? She was close with Constance after all. I'm finding it really hard to accept all of this."

My mother's laugh came through the door,"Billie never cared much for Constance. That I'm sure of. I guess it's easy to accept because I know my daughter and I know what she can do. She won't be alone."

"This is madness regardless," Vivien said irritated.

Refusing to listen another second, I pushed open the kitchen door to see their faces falter.

"Azura…what are you doing up so early?" My mom asked. I could tell she knew I had overheard.

"Couldn't sleep anymore," I shrugged,"You?"

"We were just talking," Vivien said looking at me with a strained smile plastered on her face.

"I know," was all I said back as I took a seat across from them.

"You never could contain your curiosity," my mother grinned,"I assume you heard everything?"

I nodded,"Yea. Sorry I'm not sorry."

"Azura-" Vivien began but I cut her off.

"Listen Vivien, I love you and I want you to be happy, but that isn't going to happen if I don't do this. I need you to support me, whatever the case may be. I know it's hard, believe me. I know it better than anyone. I know you gave birth to Michael and he is your son and sometimes we look at the outside and forget who someone is on the inside and it blinds us. He could destroy everything we know. Kill one, save billions. I'm still trying to figure this out too."

I watch her eyes avert from me to my mother.

"I'll make some tea."

I watch her bustle around the kitchen before giving Vivien my full attention again.

She smiled sadly,"When I first saw Michael I thought he was so beautiful…so perfect and innocent. I never thought of the possibility of what he was. Looking back now I wonder if raising him myself would have made a difference. And then there was you and Violet. Always fierce. At least you two took after your mother and me. Never any bullshit. I guess I thought you two would have perfect lives ahead of you."

"We still could you know," I smile back.

"And what about Tate?"

I stare at her blankly,"What?

"It's alright. I won't say a word," she replied taking my hand into her's,"I just want you to be sure in whatever you do. I want you to be able to have your life."

I pondered for a minute before speaking, a sudden realization dawning on me. I was still feeling as if I was contradicting myself a little.

"I think I'm going to be okay. And as for Tate, I have to save him. I have to get his soul back intact. I keep going over it in my mind; the life he could have had."

My mother finally returns with three cups of boiling tea. She always made it too hot. I set it aside, waiting for it to cool down.

"We'll have to plan this all out though. I can use what I learned in Italy but it can only get us so far," my mother said calmly as if we were just going to bake cookies and I would demand to lick the spoon like when I was five.

I looked into her eyes.

"Mom, you don't always have to be so brave. I know you don't want this life for me. It's okay to not be okay."

I see my mother's will slightly break in front of me and I grasp her hand as Vivien had grasped mine. Moment like these were what I missed most with her. They had been so forgotten lately.

"I just wish I had done something. Maybe everything would have turned out different. I feel like in a way I forced you into this life."

I chuckled softly,"We can wish and what if our whole lives and never get the answer. Life will do that to you. You two know that better than anyone. We've been doing this a long time. I don't think I would trade my life in. I think I'm where I want to be now."

I thought of Tate as I said this.

"Besides, I think Billie has a plan already."

They both stared at me uncertainly but I didn't give anything away as I finally took a sip of my tea.

"Trust me."

* * *

><p>There was a loud crash when I left the kitchen ten minutes later and I rolled my eyes in frustration. One of our vases was lying in pieces on the floor.<p>

"Troy! Bryan! Get over here now!"

The two boys peered around the corner and I beckoned them with my finger. They strolled over unwillingly, bats in hand and I folded my arms.

"What did I tell you two?"

They didn't respond.

"Well?"

"If we're going to break stuff at least let you know ahead of time," they said at the same time in droning voices. I couldn't help but smile at them.

"Alright then. Off you go," I ruffled both their hair before giving them a push towards the basement.

"My, my. Aren't you just the whole package?" An airy sarcastic voice caught my attention and I looked over to see Chad, wine glass in hand, leaning against the wall,"They never listen to anyone."

"Is that a complement?" I asked raising an eyebrow,"And you do know it's like ten in the morning."

He snorted,"I lost track of time long ago. This is just the first of many today."

I watched as he peered at me over the rim of his wine glass. I didn't not like Chad, in fact I found him kind of refreshing and funny like me and Violet's friend Eli back in Boston.

"So," he said rather firmly,"How are things with Norman Bates Jr? Any wedding bells? Or maybe perhaps funerals?"

I couldn't help but laugh at this.

"Shut up Chad. You should know well by now what's been going on."

He strolled closer to me,"Oh, indeed I do. The walls are bigger on gossip than me. It's actually insulting. I do love a good love triangle though."

I stared at him wonderingly.

"Can I ask you a question?"

He looked at me strangely like I had two heads.

"You aren't coming out are you?"

I shook my head at him and smiled sarcastically.

"No. I was just wondering about something."

"What?" he asked rather impatiently.

"If you could leave this house for good, I mean like come and go whenever you wanted, what's the first thing you would do?"

It was his turn to raise an eyebrow. He swirled the pinot around in his glass before answering.

"The first thing I would do?"

I nodded. I watched as his expression changed quickly, his eyes watering somewhat. It took me off guard and I couldn't help but watch him as he stared from the liquid in his glass, to me and then back at it.

"I'd go see my mother."

"Really?" I questioned. I had assumed he would do something much more extravagant. Or at least try to fix things with Patrick.

He looked at me with that hint of sarcasm.

"Yes, really. Believe it or not. She was and continues to be one of the most fabulous people I know. Although, she thinks I'm dead so me showing up would probably just kill her."

He sighed heavily and drained his glass.

"I must say I applaud you though. The weight on your shoulders must be excruciating. I can't wait to see how this turns out. What about you? What's the first thing you would do?"

I looked at him oddly.

"What? I can leave the house whenever already."

He covered his mouth as if he was excusing himself.

"Oh right. Silly me. I just assumed that these walls make us prisoners alive or dead."

"You know you don't always have to be a bitch," I replied,"You're actually fun to be around in moderation."

"This doesn't mean we have to be friends right?" he asked rather bored.

I smiled.

"Of course not."

He rolled his eyes in defeat and began to walk away from me. I began walking up the stairs.

"I guess you're okay too," he said catching my attention,"In moderation."

I felt a smile play at my lips and watched him vanish before finally finding my way back to my room.

"There you are," Tate said looking up at me. He had his hands folded behind his head.

"Sorry. I couldn't sleep. I didn't want to wake you."

I layed myself down next to him feeling suddenly exhausted.

"It's alright. You look tired though."

I nodded.

"A little. Mom knows I've been missing school this week. She let it slide today but she says I have to go back Monday. Everything has to appear normal. After Violet's mishaps with school last time they will start to think something's up."

He just kept staring at me with those blue eyes and I felt myself unable to breathe. Why did he have this effect on me?

"What are you going to do about Chloe and the others?"

I sighed heavily. I had totally forgot.

"Good question. I have nothing else to give to them. They can't move on unless they face you and learn the truth."

"I thought you told them the truth?" he asks.

"I did but it still has to come from you." I replied rubbing my temples,"I also need to find Chloe's parents."

Tate smiles,"I think I can help with that."

I look at him curiously,"What do you mean?"

"I found them."

"What? I asked , shocked,"How? Chloe said she could never find them."

"I used your computer," he said shrugging,"Let's just leave it at that."

I felt my heart race and didn't bother to question him about it further,"So where are they?"

He bit his lip and I found it undeniably sexy.

"Azura, her dad is dead but her mom is still alive. She lives in the next town over."

I frowned at this. Chloe's dad was dead and it hit me full on in the face. How would I tell her? Would she be expecting it? A ray of hope shown through the heartbreak, however. Her mom was still alive and that was something.

"Well I guess I know what I'm doing this weekend," I said casually and then I remembered, "How did your talk with Vi go?"

He shifted his weight slightly,"It wasn't bad. I guess we got everything out there."

I watched him closely.

"Its okay to still have feelings for her. I wouldn't want you to stop caring for her. Now we have to work on you talking to Ben and Vivien."

He smirked,"I finally feel a little bit at peace with myself. I'm glad I listened to you."

I return the smirk back and pull the covers over me. As I did so, I could feel Tate press against me. I didn't realize how much time we spent in this bed and never even did anything. Was it normal for someone my age to hardly think about sex? Then again I wasn't a normal teenager. I felt the unavoidable void I had been feeling melt away, the darkness containing itself for a brief moment. I really did think things were going to be alright in the end. In whatever direction I was headed. But one burning question was still tugging at me . And that was something I didn't want to think about at that moment in time. I still felt as if everyone was keeping something from me. Every time I walked into a room I felt as if the conversation stopped abruptly due to my entrance. Whatever it was it obviously would just cause me more stress, but at this point it probably didn't even matter. What was a little more weight?

I had forgotten for a slight moment that Tate was still next to me, the coldness I had once felt around him was evaporated. In fact, the coldness I felt from everyone in the house was diminished. I could still feel their emotions though and I was curious to know why. I couldn't be dead. I had been able to leave the house. Maybe it was just because I had been here so long. There was the sad truth. I loved this house still. My eyes averted to the floor. Pages and pages of my writing littering it. I had been inspired lately. It had been a while since I had found the will to write. I never let Tate or Violet read any of it, but I was sure they still had taken glimpses behind my back.

"Azura?"

Tate's voice filled my ears. I loved the way my name rolled off his tongue.

"Yes?"

I felt his breath on the back of my neck as he spoke.

"_Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art-. Not in lone splendor hung aloft the night. And watching, with eternal lids apart. Like nature's patient, sleepless eremite. The moving water at their preistlike task. Of pure ablution round earth's human shores. Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask. Of snow upon the mountains and the moors-. No—yet still steadfast, still unchangeable. Pillowed upon my fair love's ripening breast. To feel for ever its soft fall and swell. Awake for ever in a sweet unrest. Still, still to hear her tender taken breath. And so live ever—or else swoon to death." _

I held him tighter.

"That's Keats."

* * *

><p><em>There's gotta be someplace better<em>


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